Today’s blog site post/article is dedicated to my hometown of Memphis, Tennessee. Well, the message of this article could very well resonate with others outside of the city of Memphis and the county of Shelby. You see. I am from a city where a legendary Civil Rights leader was “set up” to be murdered by other so-called Black civil rights leaders who reportedly served as informants for the FBI and the local law enforcement agencies in the city back in 1968. The leader was Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and the informants were members of the local NAACP and a bunch of Negro preachers and Negro politico wannabes. The city of Memphis has never really recovered from that traumatic period in the city’s history. Well, I should be more specific by saying that the Blacks in that city have not really recovered from the psychological trauma of the events of 44 years ago.
The city of Memphis has not moved in a very fast or a steady pace racially, economically, educationally, and politically in these past 44 years. One can say that the psychological effects of that era could have caused a mental stalemate in the minds of many people of color. Well, Atlanta was hit with some rough times during that era, but somehow the city and its citizenry have bounced back. Since the civil rights movement, the city of Atlanta has more than reinvented itself, more than bounced back. Atlanta has become a major player in the world of economics, politics, and entertainment. If you seek a quality college education, trying to make it as an entertainer of some kind, or just simply looking for a better job to make a better living for yourself, Atlanta is on the lips of many as the suggested destination these days.
A President was brutally murdered in the city of Dallas, but it has not done a thing to detract from Dallas’ world class status as the city to be in when looking for a better life. Dallas has it all. I can actually say that Dallas “has it going on.” Dallas has a serious downtown. The city can boast about having the world famous Dallas Cowboys, the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders, the Dallas Mavericks, the world champion Texas Rangers, two major airports, plenty of nice neighborhoods to live in, malls galore, major retail/department stores and outlets, and has the destination of a few NBA all-star weekends, a super bowl or two, as well as countless of network television shows that are filmed and produced here. Dallas even has Jerry Jones, Mark Cuban, Erykah Badu and host of other millionaires along with major corporations with more relocating to the city even as we speak. Dallas is not a bad place for African Americans to begin a new start. I am living proof of this. I must also admit that Dallas has its share of issues. Yes. Dallas has “hoods” of all kinds. Yes. The politicians and preachers are up to their same economic and political tricks when it comes to serving the people. In other words, they are full of shit here too.
My point in saying all of this is to say that Memphis is a city of mentally dead people. The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan once described Memphis as a city of the dead during one of his speeches in the city years ago. Most of the Blacks in the city of Memphis still move around in the city as if they are still on a cotton plantation. Instead of them (being the majority population in the city) fighting to get off the plantation, these backwards people fight for better positions on the cotton plantation. It’s like they are afraid of even the idea of being a free and independent people. I mean, there is so much selling out and fearful silence on the part of so many so-called Black leaders in that town that it often becomes frustrating during city elections for a person like me. I never really know who to vote for in any of the political positions. So, a lot of the times, I just never really cared to vote at all when I lived there. It was literally like a waste of my time and my hard earned vote.
A particular status quo was set in the city a long time ago that has contributed to the continuous non-productive, non-progressive, fearful of change, and fear of the white power structure among the Black populace. It’s like most of the black people there have been placed under a spell or some sort of hypnosis of ignorance. The people’s issues are often placed on the back burner while the profession and corporate types live high on the hog. The Black preacher and the Black politician live easy lives as the people they pretend to serve go hungry and even go insane waiting for them to represent their interests.
However, there have been people over the years (including myself) in Memphis who was not under “the plantation spell” to stand up and challenge the status quo of the powerful elite in the city of Memphis. Many of us actually made strides in our efforts to get the people’s voices heard and to get the TRUTH out about how the people are being swindled, “bamboozled, run amuck, led a stray, and even hoodwinked” (Malcolm X) by the powers that be in that city. However, for as long I have known his name in Memphis, Thaddeus Matthews, has been giving the sell-out Black young professionals, the racist white structure, the fearful, cowardly and crooked politician, the crooked Black preacher, and anyone who dared to exploit the black community, and especially our children pure hell in person in community meetings, on his many radio shows and now on his television show.
He also served and continues to serve as somewhat of a private investigator to get and even uncover information for the community that the mainstream television, radio, and prints news media would not and/or could bring to the community. He is the reason that Black Memphis as well as the city at large is a lot smarter about politics, economics and religion. He has risked his own life and his economic livelihood in order to remain free in that city to bring much needed information to the masses in that town. However, when you stand-up and I mean really stand up the way Thaddeus has done for so many years in that town, there are consequences. The powers that be will be angry at you for trying to break the spell of fear and the system of disunity among the people.
Thaddeus Matthews is nobody’s angel. However, he is not the devil. Thaddeus Matthews is not everybody’s friend but he is friendly to all who offer him friendship. Thaddeus Matthews has a past that is not squeaky clean, but who does? Thaddeus Matthews will literally cuss your ass out if you come to him incorrectly. Shit, me too! Thaddeus Matthews is very opinionated. Thaddeus Matthews is very entertaining on his radio and television shows. He is also very enlightening. Thaddeus Matthews is not Dr. King! Thaddeus Matthew will strike you back if you strike him. He will also produce that double-barreled Mossberg shot gun. Thaddeus Matthews loves the President, just like most of you do. Thaddeus Matthews loves his children and grandchildren. Thaddeus Matthews has a personality that truly only a mother can love at times. However, when you have this understanding, you and Thaddeus get along very well. If you are not a lover of truth and justice in its rawest form, you and Thaddeus may not be able to share the same space. Thaddeus Matthews has a temper. Thaddeus Matthews also has a kind, gentle, and giving side. If don’t believe me ask his children, his grand children. Ask the many people whom he has helped in crisis through his many radio shows. Many of you in the community may not agree with the way he delivers his message in a call to action when there is a crisis in the community, but WE all must admit that he has been very effective in getting that message out there.
I have not written this article to praise Thaddeus. I have written this article to tear him down either. He does not need my help in the praise department. He gets that on his own because he has actually done the work and has made the sacrifices for many of us. I mainly wrote this article to show those in the city of Memphis who may be reveling or even celebrating the current ordeal that Thaddeus is currently being put through by the power that be that you all may need get your priorities and your egos in check. You are mad at the wrong man. Ok, if you don’t like his chosen method of delivering his message at times or his behavior/personality on the radio/television at times, fine. However, none of this makes him a criminal or even guilty of what he is being charged with. I won’t believe that you actually stand by and gleefully allow this one 55 year old man to be attacked by the system there in Memphis because he hurt your feelings in the past or you don’t agree with his opinions and/or a lot of the times, the truth about your favorite preacher or politician.
Love him or hate him. WE HAVE ALL BENEFITTED FROM HIS EFFORTS! So, please don’t sit quietly and allow this latest attack on Thaddeus to go unchallenged by us, the community. THEY DON’T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT A CHILD IN A PICTURE. Thaddeus gets to the bottom of every lie to find the truth. This is why he is being attacked today. Thaddeus, love him or hate has contacts in secret places all over the city that are able to get information that helps you, the unsuspecting Memphis citizen, to become wiser about what’s really going on in the city. Thaddeus’s ability to bring out this information has helped so many people in the city of Memphis to finally open their eyes to the lying and deceit that has kept the city of Memphis so blind and ignorant. Sadly, there are those in high and low places (Black and White) (Christian and Jew) (Gay and Straight) (old and young) who do not want you to be awakened and they want Thaddeus to stop waking up the people! So, please, don’t be distracted by the negative messages in the media.
Look. If you have an issue with Thaddeus the man, that’s one thing. However, to allow your personal issues with him to cause you to ignore all of the good that he is done in the city of Memphis and in particular Black Memphis, now that is criminal to me. I will close by saying this. WE all know what is really behind why the city of Memphis has come down so hard on Thaddeus Matthews. It has nothing to do a picture of a child being exploited. So, I will stand behind Thaddeus Matthews and his good works and not be sidetracked by obvious personal attacks by the small-minded city law enforcement and petty, vengeful people in the city of Memphis. I will definitely be sending in my donation for his legal defense fund.
THE THADDEUS MATTHEWS LEGAL DEFENSE FUND
P.O. BOX 2121, MEMPHIS TN, 38101
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Ok. The 2012 Presidential Election is over. Now what, Black Folks!?
The recent presidential election was a repeat of 2008 in the Black community. Meaning, emotions ran high. Expectations of the “so-called” first Black president were at an all time high. Debates about politics and race ran its usual emotionally driven course in our homes, on the job and on social networking sites such as face book and twitter. This time around, people actually lost long time friends because of this year’s election. People even deleted long time friends from their face book pages and twitter pages because of political disagreements about this year’s presidential election. I purposefully stayed away from political conversations this year and for the most part four years ago. I do this because when I was a young man in on the campus of Grambling State University back in the early 1990’s, I participated in debates like this all the time. I even wrote about them in the university’s news paper, the Gramblinite, as well as wrote about them in my own campus newsletter/newspaper called ‘In My Opinion’ by Rico Rivers.
My debating about politics continued even after I graduated from college in 1996 and moved back home to Memphis, TN where I would become a regular caller on popular radio talk shows speaking about the politics and the issues that affected my community in Memphis. In 2000, I put my money where my talk was and I ran for a seat on the Memphis City School Board. This is when I learned firsthand that in order to be considered a serious candidate in a political race in Memphis and running in a Black district, honesty, integrity, and the willingness to actually work hard for the people were not it. You need MONEY! You need to be associated with people with money. You need to apart of some organizations like a church or a fraternity/sorority. You need name recognition and with that name, it needs to be a name that is associated with status. I was running in race with a candidate that had more name recognition than me and the incumbent that we both sought to unseat was a long time school board member and a Negro preacher in the district. Needless to say, my ass came in third place. LOL! It was an enlightening experience. I learned that should I ever decide to run for a political office again in a Black district, I will at least have some money to buy commercial time on television and radio as well as to rent billboards across the district in order to get my message across to the people I aim to represent in whatever the office is I am running for at that time. As far as belonging to a church or a fraternity, THAT AIN’T GONNA HAPPEN!
Anyway, on election night, I really did not watch any election coverage on television. I just went about my evening as usual. Of course, I would check out some results every now and then, but nothing more. However, I did get to my computer at work the next morning to read up on the aftermath of the election. I was so surprised to read about others who had won on the night of the election besides President Obama. I read where the advocates behind the legalization of marijuana had won their in push to legalize the recreational use of marijuana in two states. I also read in the same article where the homosexual community had gained the right to marry in two more states. Not far from this article, I read where the Hispanic community had already gotten organized to get with the newly re-elected President to get back to work on the immigration protection law, the Dream Act, which protects Hispanic children who were brought to the US by undocumented parents. Now, I begin clicking pages and sites to look for what Black people won on election night.
While I was clicking to find such an article, I ran across some statistics that showed a breakdown of who voted for the President in the minority community. Let’s see. Asians reportedly voted 71 percent for Obama. Hispanics reported voted 73 percent for Obama. Blacks reported voted an astounding 93 percent for the President. Hmmm, still, I was unable to find any article on the entire World Wide Web that showed anything that black people won election night as a result of Obama being re-elected by them at 93 percent. This could be laughable, but it is too sad to crack a smile at. A lot of Black people fell out with each other at work, at church, in college and de-friended each other on face book and Twitter and don’t have a damn thing to show for it accept for bragging rights over their candidate winning. My question is, “When are Black people going to get it?” These other groups get it. These other groups seem to get what our very own Frederick Douglas said back in the day which was, “Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never did and it never will.”
All WE seem to want from this president and this country are the right to party, the right to laugh, the right to screw, the right to cuss, the right to shop or be overall consumers, the right to be uppity, and the right to pay for what we want but BEG for what we need. This thinking is apparently not the thinking of other special interests groups and racial/ethnic groups in this country. They demand respect. They demand protection under this American flag for their people. They demand funding for their children’s education and they demand that the politicians they vote into office represent their agenda. WE still have not mastered this even on the local levels. When Obama was elected the first time, many in the Black community said, “Give him a chance to get the Bush mess cleaned up before demanding anything from him. “ or “Hey, he is not just the President for Black people. He is the President for all people in this country.” Well, all of the other people made demands on this president during his first term and got what they wanted, while Blacks in this country are still waiting on Jesus to return before demanding something in return for their vote from this current President.
Finally, there are those who decided not to vote in this election. There were those who did not vote in the election four year ago. They have that right. Their decision not to vote did not take away their voice because they are intelligent enough to know that voting is a personal right and not a demand of others. This group of non-voters should not be attacked for exercising their right to not vote. They should not be subject to stupid lines, “If you don’t vote, you don’t have a say.” Or “Your vote is your voice.” How about this one? “If you don’t vote, you have nothing to complain about.” The one that got me the most was, “Hey, our ancestors died for your right to vote.” Really? Name two ancestors. What ancestors are you referring to? All of a sudden, black people who never mention anything about Black ancestry and Black history or anything dealing with Black people, all of a sudden have this connection to our “ancestry” during a political season. These same people don’t give a damn about Blackness and not to mention Black ancestry when it’s not a political season.
Ok. I’m done. I just wanted to share my thoughts on this year’s election and how WE as a community still don’t get it. So, to the Obama fans enjoy your bragging rights. To the non-voters, I understand where you are coming from. You get no criticisms from me. To the gay community, the marijuana advocates, and to other ethnic and racial groups in this country, I hope to be like you all when I grow up. I hope Black people will someday take a page from your playbook of politics and progress to understand what power and progress are really about.
My debating about politics continued even after I graduated from college in 1996 and moved back home to Memphis, TN where I would become a regular caller on popular radio talk shows speaking about the politics and the issues that affected my community in Memphis. In 2000, I put my money where my talk was and I ran for a seat on the Memphis City School Board. This is when I learned firsthand that in order to be considered a serious candidate in a political race in Memphis and running in a Black district, honesty, integrity, and the willingness to actually work hard for the people were not it. You need MONEY! You need to be associated with people with money. You need to apart of some organizations like a church or a fraternity/sorority. You need name recognition and with that name, it needs to be a name that is associated with status. I was running in race with a candidate that had more name recognition than me and the incumbent that we both sought to unseat was a long time school board member and a Negro preacher in the district. Needless to say, my ass came in third place. LOL! It was an enlightening experience. I learned that should I ever decide to run for a political office again in a Black district, I will at least have some money to buy commercial time on television and radio as well as to rent billboards across the district in order to get my message across to the people I aim to represent in whatever the office is I am running for at that time. As far as belonging to a church or a fraternity, THAT AIN’T GONNA HAPPEN!
Anyway, on election night, I really did not watch any election coverage on television. I just went about my evening as usual. Of course, I would check out some results every now and then, but nothing more. However, I did get to my computer at work the next morning to read up on the aftermath of the election. I was so surprised to read about others who had won on the night of the election besides President Obama. I read where the advocates behind the legalization of marijuana had won their in push to legalize the recreational use of marijuana in two states. I also read in the same article where the homosexual community had gained the right to marry in two more states. Not far from this article, I read where the Hispanic community had already gotten organized to get with the newly re-elected President to get back to work on the immigration protection law, the Dream Act, which protects Hispanic children who were brought to the US by undocumented parents. Now, I begin clicking pages and sites to look for what Black people won on election night.
While I was clicking to find such an article, I ran across some statistics that showed a breakdown of who voted for the President in the minority community. Let’s see. Asians reportedly voted 71 percent for Obama. Hispanics reported voted 73 percent for Obama. Blacks reported voted an astounding 93 percent for the President. Hmmm, still, I was unable to find any article on the entire World Wide Web that showed anything that black people won election night as a result of Obama being re-elected by them at 93 percent. This could be laughable, but it is too sad to crack a smile at. A lot of Black people fell out with each other at work, at church, in college and de-friended each other on face book and Twitter and don’t have a damn thing to show for it accept for bragging rights over their candidate winning. My question is, “When are Black people going to get it?” These other groups get it. These other groups seem to get what our very own Frederick Douglas said back in the day which was, “Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never did and it never will.”
All WE seem to want from this president and this country are the right to party, the right to laugh, the right to screw, the right to cuss, the right to shop or be overall consumers, the right to be uppity, and the right to pay for what we want but BEG for what we need. This thinking is apparently not the thinking of other special interests groups and racial/ethnic groups in this country. They demand respect. They demand protection under this American flag for their people. They demand funding for their children’s education and they demand that the politicians they vote into office represent their agenda. WE still have not mastered this even on the local levels. When Obama was elected the first time, many in the Black community said, “Give him a chance to get the Bush mess cleaned up before demanding anything from him. “ or “Hey, he is not just the President for Black people. He is the President for all people in this country.” Well, all of the other people made demands on this president during his first term and got what they wanted, while Blacks in this country are still waiting on Jesus to return before demanding something in return for their vote from this current President.
Finally, there are those who decided not to vote in this election. There were those who did not vote in the election four year ago. They have that right. Their decision not to vote did not take away their voice because they are intelligent enough to know that voting is a personal right and not a demand of others. This group of non-voters should not be attacked for exercising their right to not vote. They should not be subject to stupid lines, “If you don’t vote, you don’t have a say.” Or “Your vote is your voice.” How about this one? “If you don’t vote, you have nothing to complain about.” The one that got me the most was, “Hey, our ancestors died for your right to vote.” Really? Name two ancestors. What ancestors are you referring to? All of a sudden, black people who never mention anything about Black ancestry and Black history or anything dealing with Black people, all of a sudden have this connection to our “ancestry” during a political season. These same people don’t give a damn about Blackness and not to mention Black ancestry when it’s not a political season.
Ok. I’m done. I just wanted to share my thoughts on this year’s election and how WE as a community still don’t get it. So, to the Obama fans enjoy your bragging rights. To the non-voters, I understand where you are coming from. You get no criticisms from me. To the gay community, the marijuana advocates, and to other ethnic and racial groups in this country, I hope to be like you all when I grow up. I hope Black people will someday take a page from your playbook of politics and progress to understand what power and progress are really about.
Sunday, September 30, 2012
I am from Memphis, Tennessee
I am from Memphis, Tennessee. I was born and raised in the north section of the city. I came along when north Memphis was just becoming an all black section in the early 1970’s. Memphis has always been a special city and a unique city when it comes to the music (that so many musicians/artists have copied) the dancing (that so many people from other cities have copied) and of course the food particularly soul food and barbeque. No other city has ever been able to copy either one of those delicacies. Memphis is a very historic place. It is the place where freed slave, Tom Lee, saved the lives of many white people during turn of the century when a great flood hit the city and yellow fever was wiping people out. Memphis is the place that was chosen for the assassination of civil rights leader, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.. Memphis is also a place where there is a very huge statue of Confederate General, Nathan Bedford Forrest, who is also cited as being the founder of the Ku Klux Klan in the very middle of the city.
Memphis is a city that has only had three Black mayors in its 193 years of existence. The first Black mayor was elected in 1991. Memphis is also the home of the so-called King of Rock n Roll, Elvis Presley. His mansion, Graceland, currently sits in the heart of the Black community as we speak. Memphis is also home to its only Black owned radio station, WLOK and the very first Black formatted radio (that’s owned by whites) in history, WDIA. Memphis is also home to the Tri-State Defender, a small newspaper that is marketed to African Americans in the city. Now, beginning Monday, October 1, 2012, Memphis will have its very first Black owned, Black funded television network. I would like to use my blog to officially welcome Memphis Urban TV-1 to the city of Memphis. It has been a long time coming. The current white media in Memphis (newspapers, radio stations, TV stations) have kept Memphis in the dark for so long as it relates to the limited information it only shares with the citizens of Memphis. Memphis is a majority Black city, but it is just now getting a black owned media source that will hopefully open up the flood gates that will now allow information (unedited) to flow throughout the city. The new television station can also serve as a vehicle for changing the way African-Americans have been portrayed in that particular city by the mainstream white media in that city. I am hoping that Memphis at large will seize this opportunity to become a part of the much needed change in the way news and images are delivered in that city.
I am hoping that the African American community in Memphis will now realize that taking ownership of one’s destiny, culture and one’s future is not just for “other people.” I am hoping that the entire city does not view this new and much needed media venture as being intrusive and unnecessary. Memphis is a majority Black city that operates like a minority Black city. It sort of reminds me of South Africa during the years of Apartheid as it relates to the power structure. You have about 20 white economic power brokers in the city that have complete control of hundreds and thousands of Blacks in that town. It is actually both sad and amazing to see. It does not matter of the mayor is Black in Memphis. It does not matter if the city council is majority Black in Memphis. It does not matter if the school board is majority Black. It does not matter if the congressman from Memphis is Black. It does not matter if the director of the Memphis Police department is Black.
None of these seem to have mattered because the mass majority of Blacks in Memphis appear to be too caught up in Church and religion to care about ownership, images, culture, and its destiny it seems. It does not matter because far too many Blacks in that town are more than willing to “sell out” the Black community for a couple of dollars, a car, and a false sense of status which has been the reward for many of the sell outs in my hometown. I am hoping with the new television and the support from many in the city, the station will grow to own other media outlets such as a competing major Black newspaper and a radio station or two. For now, I will celebrate this new beginning, this new venture. It has been a long time coming. I will look for more to come in the future. The children in the city of Memphis can use every ounce of ray of light and hope they can get these days. Congratulations to the TBJ-Media Communications Group, LLC for creating this media source. Whenever I come home to Memphis for a visit, I will be sure to turn to Comcast Channel 31 to check out the line-up. In the meantime, I will be sure to log on to www.MUTV1.com to watch the shows live online beginning Monday, October 1, 2012. Best of luck and continued success!!!
Sunday, September 23, 2012
Is Homosexuality becoming "The New Normal?"
The 2012 fall season of television has begun to unfold. Personally, I can’t wait for the new season of Law and Order SVU to start. The final episode of last season was definitely a cliff hanger for me. However, with every new television season the four major networks (FOX, NBC, CBS and ABC) get busy trying to out-do each other in the constant race for ratings. They are also trying one-up a lot of the popular programming that cable offers. This season appears to be shaping up to be the year of the homosexual. There are at least three shows that I have seen on the roster that have deliberate gay themes. One show in particular is called, "The New Normal," which happens to come from the same people who created the show, "Will & Grace" back in the day. This show is about a married male gay couple deciding to have a baby with a surrogate mom. Nene Leakes, from The Real Housewives of Atlanta cable show, plays the sassy, bossy (sounds familiar) administrative assistant at the company where one of the main characters works.
Gay themed shows on network television is not something new because popular shows like Will & Grace lasted on NBC for years. However, cable television has always had a large number of gay themed shows. I guess Will & Grace was not enough, because the big four networks now each has gay themed shows on the fall television roster. So, what does this mean? What does this say about current society and its view on homosexuality? What is the message being sent by these four major media sources about homosexuality? Hell, Heterosexuality? Has homosexuality officially become the new normal? Or have the image makers and message senders decided that they are just going to force this concept of natural and normal on the American public without our permission? I am just asking.
I am asking because it I have always known what normal is what it comes to the creation of children and when it came to a marriage. When did that “normal” become outdated and antiquated? When did man sticking his penis inside of woman to create life become “not the thing to do” with so many men? When did a woman not wanting to receive a penis in for the purpose of creating life become “not the thing to do” for so many women? I am just curious. When did “what a family consists of” become so debated and dissected that a man, a woman, and the children that the two of them create become so re-defined from that normal? Would someone please educate me on this? Where was I when all of this was going on? LOL!
Anyway, this article has nothing to do with gay rights. Hell, I don’t even know what gay rights are and what they consist of. However, I am very opened to being educated on that too. These shows are on television this fall. You as an individual can make the decision for yourself whether or not you will watch them. You as an individual can make the decision on what you would like to teach your child about this “new normal” movement that appears to be up on us. I watched a partial episode of the show, “The New Normal.” I watched it all the way up the scene where the two lead gay characters were laying in the bed discussing having a baby with a surrogate, which was not so bad. However when they stopped talking and started kissing, I turned the channel to watch "The Voice." The show is not funny and Nene’s acting is horrible. I watched Will & Grace when it came on NBC back in the day. The characters Jack and Karen were funny as hell. That show went for laughs. I am afraid that these “new normal” shows this fall may be going for something much more deeper than laughs. You be the judge.
Gay themed shows on network television is not something new because popular shows like Will & Grace lasted on NBC for years. However, cable television has always had a large number of gay themed shows. I guess Will & Grace was not enough, because the big four networks now each has gay themed shows on the fall television roster. So, what does this mean? What does this say about current society and its view on homosexuality? What is the message being sent by these four major media sources about homosexuality? Hell, Heterosexuality? Has homosexuality officially become the new normal? Or have the image makers and message senders decided that they are just going to force this concept of natural and normal on the American public without our permission? I am just asking.
I am asking because it I have always known what normal is what it comes to the creation of children and when it came to a marriage. When did that “normal” become outdated and antiquated? When did man sticking his penis inside of woman to create life become “not the thing to do” with so many men? When did a woman not wanting to receive a penis in for the purpose of creating life become “not the thing to do” for so many women? I am just curious. When did “what a family consists of” become so debated and dissected that a man, a woman, and the children that the two of them create become so re-defined from that normal? Would someone please educate me on this? Where was I when all of this was going on? LOL!
Anyway, this article has nothing to do with gay rights. Hell, I don’t even know what gay rights are and what they consist of. However, I am very opened to being educated on that too. These shows are on television this fall. You as an individual can make the decision for yourself whether or not you will watch them. You as an individual can make the decision on what you would like to teach your child about this “new normal” movement that appears to be up on us. I watched a partial episode of the show, “The New Normal.” I watched it all the way up the scene where the two lead gay characters were laying in the bed discussing having a baby with a surrogate, which was not so bad. However when they stopped talking and started kissing, I turned the channel to watch "The Voice." The show is not funny and Nene’s acting is horrible. I watched Will & Grace when it came on NBC back in the day. The characters Jack and Karen were funny as hell. That show went for laughs. I am afraid that these “new normal” shows this fall may be going for something much more deeper than laughs. You be the judge.
Monday, September 17, 2012
Black Afrikan-Centered Consciousness: Is it still what it used to be back in the day?
I have always considered myself to be “conscious” as it relates to knowing and understanding what racism/white supremacy is, its purpose and its agenda. I have always considered myself to be pretty knowledgeable of many thing Afrikan and Afrikan centered. So, therefore nothing that occurs under this system rare ever confuses or surprises me. However, since moving away from Memphis five years ago, I had not been around the “conscious” segment of the Black community since leaving my dear ole hometown of Memphis. In my separation from the “knowledge,” and the "conscious community, I sort of found myself slipping spiritually. I stopped a lot of reading that I was doing. My motto had become “If it don’t make dollars, it don’t make sense.” I had become so engulfed in chasing the dollar bill that when I moved to Dallas in 2008, I had made it official that I was not going to connect with the conscious community here in Dallas. This is not to say that I had totally and completely walked away from books, my learning about myself and my culture, I just wanted to concentrate more on my self-development as it relates to my chosen profession, which social work (mental health & drug addiction). I had a few goals to accomplish and I needed to remain focus. I am halfway to meeting these professional goals and I energized as ever.
However, after having been here in Dallas for three years, back in January of this year I began to become curious about the conscious community here in Dallas. A couple of years ago, I found a sista who can twist my hair into locs and who was also into African-centered consciousness. Over the past two years of her doing my hair, we discussed all types of topics from race to politics, to religion to African culture to Black folks in America, and even popular culture and how it affects or impacts the Black community. These hair appointments are always cool. I get my hair washed and twisted, plus have a healthy conversation about real life in the process. It was this connection that contributed more to my curiosity about the conscious community at large in Dallas. Well, anyway, during a most recent hair appointment, I saw this flyer in the building where the sister has her shop that read, “SOUL-utionary Weekend” DFW Sistas of the Black Woman’s Agenda Present- SIS. Letava Mabiligengo (mother ,author, lecturer, home school educator, matriarchal nation-builder, mentor, founder of the Black Woman’s agenda, sister, freedom) SEPTEMBER 7 & 8, 2012. Wow! This woman has more labels than fashion week in New York and more titles than a book store. LOL! Anyway, I am sure she paid a lot of money for those titles and labels.
Last Saturday night on the 8th, I decided at the last minute to go the Pan-African Connection Bookstore in South Dallas to hear this so-called conscious and African-centric Black woman speak on “Black Solutions for Black Problems.” The program was from 7pm to 10pm. I did not arrive until 9pm. However, it turned out to be a good time for me to arrive. When I arrived, it felt like I was returning to some old stomping grounds. For many years when I lived in Memphis, I participated in a lot of the events like poetry readings, concerts, and deep cultural discussions that were a part of the conscious community in Memphis. I wore my Afrikan Ankh and some other Afrikan jewelry as well as read my African-centered authored books. I was pretty tight with “the movement” for long while up until I moved away from Memphis in 2007. I arrived to the event just as the conversation in the sparsely attended room was turning to relationships and mental health. I love topics on relationships and mental health. I was very curious to know what this supposedly African-centric speaker thought about Black mental health and what would serve as a possible solution for aiding in black mental health. I was also curious to know how this room, which was filled with Black people sporting afros, locs, African jewelry, African names, with an African-centered book store downstairs felt about Black mental health and relationships.
Well, one woman in the audience shared her story about being sexually abused in her house hold growing up as the only female among brothers and uncles as well as shedding some light on the reality that men get molested as well as when they are children. This woman in the audience went on to say that it takes a “real man” to accept and love his woman unconditionally when she has gone through so much in her life. The woman in the audience went on to say, “I often tell young sistas this, “Treat your body like it is a million dollar home.” “Don’t let some 10 dollar ass Nigga come along tear your hear house up!” Her comment was immediately followed by sounds and claps of approval of what she said. I was like, “What!?” “Niggas?” The speaker responded, “You are right, Sista. It does take a strong man to do this” “Brothas, let’s face it. You will never know your woman fully.” “You will never know everything about your woman. There are some things that she will never tell you.” “Brothas, keep it real. You won’t be able to handle everything your woman has to tell you.” Now, as the woman and the speaker was saying all of this, I was thinking, “The only thing that a woman would not be able to tell her man is either she has cheated on him or she has been raped and/ or molested as a child or a teenager."
As soon as I had this thought in my head, the speakers says, “Brothaz, your woman may not be able to tell you about her being raped or molested as a child.” I was like, “DUH!” I listened to the conversation that was being had in room until speaker took time to take a breath from hearing herself speak to entertain a couple of questions. I immediately raised my hand. My question had a comment attached to it. I said, “Hello, my name is Rico and I am social worker who has worked as a counselor and therapist and one who has worked with the very types of men that the woman in the audience just spoke of as it relates to them dealing with sexual abuse. My question is twofold. As it relates to a “real man” having to accept and love his woman with all of her issues, wouldn’t it be fair for a person to get himself or herself together emotionally and mentally before meeting someone or allowing an unsuspecting person to get with them? Number two, as one who understands that many in the Black community tend to view counseling as a cuss word; what is the conscious community’s attitude or perception of seeking counseling or therapy to help with emotional or mental issues?”
The speaker responded to the first part of my question by saying, “You’re right, Brotha. I agree. I think we should have our stuff together before we meet.” Here is how she answered my question about seeking therapy as a solution. She said, “Brotha, yeah many of us do tend to look at counseling as a cuss word but not because of counseling, but because of the Psychologist/counselor trying to tell us what to think.” I was like, “What!?” She went on to say, “Brotha, in order for you to be able to counsel us, you must live among us. You must come to where are in order to understand where we are coming from.” “You must be able to identify with us or to help us.” I replied. “I understand what you saying.” “This is why counselors and therapists come in all various ages, races, ethnicities and genders. It is a simple process. This is why you choose a counselor/therapist that best meets your needs.” “You can choose a therapist that you can identify with on the level that’s comfortable for you as the client.”
I went on to share with her that not all therapists and counselors try to tell their clients what to think. I know that I don’t. I shared with her the process that is mainly used by most counselors and therapist when helping clients. I told her (the speaker and the audience) that the counselor is there to merely help the client describe the pain that they have been struggling with for so long. Our job is to just listen and in our listening, we are able to ask the right questions that will help in leading the client to the resolution that they have been seeking, but unable to do so. I went on to give (what I thought was a harmless example) of what it could look like. I said, “Take for instance you are teaching a three year old how to ride a bike that has training wheels. You push him or her along until he/she masters the bike on his/her own and when he/she has built up the courage to ride the bike on his/her own, you then take off the training wheels and he is on his way.” Well, this example did not sit well with the speaker. She responded by saying, “Brotha, you just offended the room when referred to us as 3 year old.” I was like, “WTF!? Is she serious?” She went on to say, “Brotha, you just proved to us in this room that you were not listening.” The room then began to rumble and give her signs of approval of what she had just said to me. I was like, “I was listening. This is why I asked the question that I asked.” She went on to say, “You see, Brotha. This is why many in African community don’t go to counseling because the way you are being condescending and putting people down.” Again, I was like, “WTF!?”
I replied to her, “I did not offend anyone in the room.” She said, “You see. You are now trying to tell me that I am not offended. You are trying to tell me what to feel.” I responded “You said that I offended the people in the room. I need you to just speak for you.” Well, needless to say, she did like that response. So, she sarcastically took a poll of the audience and said, “Ok Brotha. So you said that I should only speak for myself. Well, anybody else in the room feel offended by what this Brotha said?” The rumbling from the audience covered the entire room. It was the perfect preacher like call and response. “Yeah, he offended me!” One Black guy even raised his hand with a might force to say, Yes, Sista. I felt offended!” I was like, “Well, damn.”
Feeling validated and empowered by her subjects, the speaker went on to say, ‘Brotha, you paid a lot for those degrees and those labels, but you are pushing the oppressor’s psychology.” This is the moment when I just stopped and waited for the end of program. Besides, who in the entire room had more labels and titles than her on the flyer that advertised her program. So stupid. I knew then that I had made a grave mistake by introducing myself as a man with a college degree to this particular audience. So, I just waved the white flag of surrender and just listened to the rest of this poor woman’s rhetoric. She went on to assume that I was offended by the way she had just manipulated the entire room into hating me for something so simple and trivial. I quickly let her that I was not offended at all by her. Then, I stopped talking and just listened. She went on to say stupid shit like, “It’s not the African community does not like to seek counsel. We just don’t care for counseling.” She went on to give this ridiculous scenario that went like this, “Sistaz, have you ever called up your girls in the middle of the night after you have had issues with your man and you all talk about it?” I was like, “How ignorant was that example?” Of course, the audience ate it up with cheers of approval. I was just waiting for Jim Jones to arise from the dead to start handing out cups of red kool-aid. Trust me. She would have convinced this room to drink the poison because it would have been the African thing to do.
I think what I was most disappointed about this experience was when a young lady raised her hand to ask a question, but changed her mind after hearing how I was raked over the coals for being in the field of counseling and it being associated with psychology, which was officially made the common evil of that night. The young lady instead made a statement. “She said, I am in college and I am studying psychology, but I think that I am going to change my major.” My heart dropped, but cheers from the audience flowed in the room. I was officially done. However, there were a couple of women trying to convince not to change her major, but make her major concentrated on helping Black people. Damn. I thought I had done just that with my degree from my historically Black university. I guess since the speaker accused me of spreading the oppressor’s psychology, I was not Black anymore.
After the speech was over, I went up to the speaker to say hello and exchange business cards. We were both cordial. I also made a bee-line to the young lady to give her my card with hopes of getting the opportunity to let her know that she is doing great and not let anybody take her off her course. As I mingled around the room filled with the so-called pro-Black, African conscious Black folks wearing, locs, fros, twists, African jewelry, I felt like I had yelled the name of Adolf Hitler in a Jewish Synagogue. I was literally shunned in the room. These Black people walked right past me in that small room as if I were the plague. I even brought money to the event to spend. Well, one thing about me is that I don’t ever beg anybody to take my money. The brotha that raised his hand to say that I offended him was selling tee-shirts, I wanted one of them. He looked me in face with a smirk on his face as if to say, “Yeah, she told you.” He did not acknowledge me and walked away from his childish, ignorant ass.
However, my stylist was there and she introduced me to a few friends of hers, in particularly a couple who sold Shea Butter soap. They were really nice. I bought a jar of it from them. It smells really good too. She also introduced me to a two more friends of hers who were there for the speech. They were nice as well. However, that was it. Wait. The older lady who owns the Pan African Connection Bookstore was also really nice. The experience taught me that I have really outgrown many of the philosophies of the so-called conscious community. The speaker’s ideology about Blackness, African-centered consciousness, and seeking counseling was outdated and antiquated. Still, I am not holding it against the entire Dallas African-centered conscious community for the ignorance of the invited guest speaker and those who acted stupid because they believed her to be so knowledgeable. Trust me. If your knowledge can not build the wealth that is needed to fund whatever movement you want to get started, you ain’t talking about shit! We live under capitalism. If you don’t have capital, it ain’t gonna happen.
I do have plans to continue to attend other programs sponsored by the conscious community in Dallas in the future. However, I will be sure to steer clear of the angry black feminists programs because that ain’t African. I will return to the bookstore in the future to make some purchases. I will continue to get to know the conscious community in Dallas, but with the understanding that some people are still caught up in certain philosophies that sound good, which unfortunately allows them to be preyed upon by these conscious pimps such as what happened on last Saturday night. I am so glad that I have always had my own mind to decipher what the truth is and what I lie looks like when I see him or her.
Sunday, September 09, 2012
Just Sharing An Epiphany after the weekend I had.
This past weekend really served as an eye-opener, a re-affirming of life’s goals and the direction in which I am headed in. This past weekend also served as a time of relaxation sprinkled with a dash of reflection. Friday at work, I finally told an old co-worker what I really thought about him and his ability to correctly assess the mental functioning of some of the clients we work with. For the past two years that I have worked with this old therapist, he has had this bad habit of referring to only the Black clients on his therapy case load as “lower functioning.” Yes. I have sat in many clinical staff meetings and tolerated out of professional calmness to discipline this character referring to these women as lower-functioning. On this past Wednesday during a clinical meeting, he said it again. Instead of letting it pass, I asked him in front of all in attendance what was his criterion for labeling so many of the clients lower functioning. His face became a little red, but he proceeded to crank out some less than clinical reasons for him viewing these women this way. I was not satisfied with the answer he gave and I am sure the look on my face told the whole story. My boss, who was sitting two persons over from me, suggested that we table the discussion until Friday during our smaller staff meeting. Well, I thought this was the last I would hear anything on the matter.
This past Friday came and we had our little staff meeting discussing the behavior and progress of the clients in the facility. There was about minutes left in the hour long meeting, when out of no-where, the therapist from Wednesday’s agency clinical meeting, asked if he could continue the discussion where I questioned his therapeutic judgment. He said, “I would like to continue the discussion where Rico questioned me why I refer to clients as lower functioning.” “Rico, I want you to know that I have been a therapist for 25 years and when you questioned my judgment like that in front of the probation officers, you sent out the message that there may be some animosity between us as an entire clinical team.” “I felt that you were being inappropriate and very undermining of me when you questioned me like that.”
Of course, my blood was boiling as he went on forever it seemed about what a professional he was and how he has been a competent clinician for so many years. In his sick mind, he thought he was putting me in my place so that I would know better next time not to express any of my thoughts in a clinical meeting amongst fellow clinicians and probation officers. Yes. Somebody must have told him wrong. I sat patiently as he ranted and vented his frustrations. However when he was done, my clinical supervisor looked over at me and asked, “Rico, do you have anything to say?” I was like, “Yes, I do.” I took a deep breath and I let him have it until all of the breath that I had just inhaled had left my body. I stared him dead in his face and said, “First of all, I have been a social worker since 1996. I have worked as a mental health therapist and a substance abuse counselor since 2000.” “I CAN ASK YOU ANY QUESTION I WANT TO ASK YOU! I DON’T LIVE FOR YOUR APPROVAL or ANYONE ELSE’S APPROVAL!” “However, as clinicians, we are supposed to be intelligent enough and educated enough to know that the clients that we receive at this agency may not function on the level that we are operating on, but they function well enough to survive outside of this agency.
Many of the people that you often refer to as “lower-functioning live better than some of us in here. They have husbands, children, jobs, they go shopping, pay car notes and pump gas and many of the very same gas stations where we go.” Also, I have found it very interesting that over the past two years that every female that you have labeled ‘lower-functioning” has been a Black female.” He quickly interrupted me with, “No. That’s not true.” I just as quickly reminded him not to interrupt me when I am talking because I did not interrupt him. I stated, “It is very true. I have never heard you refer to a white client or a Hispanic client as being lower functioning. He interrupted again by saying, “You don’t what you are talking about.” I responded, “Yes. I do!” This is when my boss intervened as suggested that we end the discussion before it got really ugly in that meeting.
Well, I was done with it. This nut job even had the audacity to try to shake my hand after the meeting was over. Anyway, I felt a great relief after I had finally gotten that off of my chest. Now whether or not I have a job on tomorrow, Monday the 10th, that’s another story, LOL!! Anyway, as I was headed home after an obvious long day at work, I saw this woman trying to push her stalled car out of the way of flowing traffic. I pulled into the parking lot of the Popeye’s that I was headed to (don’t judge me! lol) and got out of my car to see what her situation was and then I proceeded to walk towards her to offer my help. Then, all of a sudden, she gave the car a big push in reverse and then attempted to jump back inside and steer her car out of traffic. I made it there just as she has slammed her door. I told her to stay inside of the care as I began to push. When I began pushing the car a young Mexican man walked by and asked if he could help and said yes. Then a second older Mexican man joined in on the pushing. We safely guided her out of traffic and into the Popeye’s parking lot.
Well, she got out of her call and thanked me. She stated that she thought something was wrong with ignition or at least she hoped that it was just a case of her running out of gas and nothing more serious. We shared a quick laugh about how she was really getting her hustle on trying to push that car out of traffic. I even mimicked the way she gave her stalled car a quick, hard push and tried to jump in it like a go cart. LOL! We both laughed our asses off in the parking lot before I offered to drive her to the nearest gas station to fill up her gasoline container. She thanked me for being there to help her. She said that I was a blessing and she did not know what she was going to do. I said thank you. She went on to say, “You know being a single woman out here, you gotta do what you gotta do when you don’t have a man to help you. I replied, “I hear ya.” When made back to her car and it turned out that all she needed was gas. She cranked her car up with the biggest sigh of relief on her face. She told me thank you again and I told her no problem. She said, “Look, I still want to give you something. I want to buy some chicken (referring to Popeye’s). I quickly told her, “No. I’m good. I am just glad I was able to help.” This is how I give back to the universe. It will come back to me the same way I put it in the universe” “You can thank me by helping someone the same way I helped you.” She said sternly, but with an appreciative smile, “I know, but I still want you have this.” I reluctantly accepted her monetary gesture of thanks and wished her a good evening.
On this past Saturday afternoon, I was privileged to attend an annual block party that is hosted by this non-profit organization called APAA, (Association of Persons Affected by Addictions) which is located in downtown Dallas in the medical district. APAA has a relationship with the company that I work for in that as soon as the clients are discharged after having recieved four months of in-patient residential treatment with us, APAA offers them after care services such as Narcotics Anonmous groups, DRA (Dual Recovery Anonymous) groups and Alcoholics Anonymous groups as well as getiting them connected to much needed support services in the Dallas area.
I hung out for about three hours listening to guest speakers share their stories of courage, strength, and hope since winning their personal battles with alcohol and drug addiction. I am often inspired whenever I get the opportunity to hear an ex-addict and/or alcoholic speak their truth. The time I spent at the block party also served as a reunion of sorts for me and some former clients of the agency where I work. I was so happy to see how well they were doing out here in society being clean, sober, and on their proper medications. It warmed my heart to hear them tell me how much they appreciated me for helping them make it at the agency. It made me feel even better when many of them would say, “Thank you, Mr. Rico for all that you taught me while I was at that place. I learned a lot from your groups.” All and all, I had a good day. However, they also shared with me stories of the many that have not been so fortunate while out here in society. A lot of others have either gone back to using drugs or have been re-arrested and sentenced to serve jail time by the courts.
Well, in this line of work, one has to be able to take the good with the bad. You learn to cherish the good news, while you continue to try to prevent the bad everyday you go to work. The visit to the sober block party served as a great balance and end of work week stress reliever. Where I work, I don’t really get to see the results of my contributions to the mental health field. I don’t really get to see the results of a day to day grind working to encourage and even convince a certain population of people that has mostly experienced hurt, disappointment, rejection and even abandonment in the lives that even though they have gone through so much in their lives a better and brighter day is very close on the horizon. I let them know often that even though their drug usage and mental illness diagnosis have caused some people in society to look down on them and even shun them in public, its ok. It’s ok that some people won’t let go of the old you. That’s cool too. You can let them have the old you because you have been blessed to be in total control of the new you and ain’t a damn thing they can do about it.
This past weekend served as an affirmation that I am where I am supposed to be. I am supposed to be in the helping field. I am supposed to be where others who are down and need a little help getting back up can reach up and grab my hand. I am supposed to be a social worker. I am supposed to be a counselor. I am supposed to be a skilled helper. I am exactly where the Creator wants be to be. I wish the same for all of you who took time out to read my story.
This past Friday came and we had our little staff meeting discussing the behavior and progress of the clients in the facility. There was about minutes left in the hour long meeting, when out of no-where, the therapist from Wednesday’s agency clinical meeting, asked if he could continue the discussion where I questioned his therapeutic judgment. He said, “I would like to continue the discussion where Rico questioned me why I refer to clients as lower functioning.” “Rico, I want you to know that I have been a therapist for 25 years and when you questioned my judgment like that in front of the probation officers, you sent out the message that there may be some animosity between us as an entire clinical team.” “I felt that you were being inappropriate and very undermining of me when you questioned me like that.”
Of course, my blood was boiling as he went on forever it seemed about what a professional he was and how he has been a competent clinician for so many years. In his sick mind, he thought he was putting me in my place so that I would know better next time not to express any of my thoughts in a clinical meeting amongst fellow clinicians and probation officers. Yes. Somebody must have told him wrong. I sat patiently as he ranted and vented his frustrations. However when he was done, my clinical supervisor looked over at me and asked, “Rico, do you have anything to say?” I was like, “Yes, I do.” I took a deep breath and I let him have it until all of the breath that I had just inhaled had left my body. I stared him dead in his face and said, “First of all, I have been a social worker since 1996. I have worked as a mental health therapist and a substance abuse counselor since 2000.” “I CAN ASK YOU ANY QUESTION I WANT TO ASK YOU! I DON’T LIVE FOR YOUR APPROVAL or ANYONE ELSE’S APPROVAL!” “However, as clinicians, we are supposed to be intelligent enough and educated enough to know that the clients that we receive at this agency may not function on the level that we are operating on, but they function well enough to survive outside of this agency.
Many of the people that you often refer to as “lower-functioning live better than some of us in here. They have husbands, children, jobs, they go shopping, pay car notes and pump gas and many of the very same gas stations where we go.” Also, I have found it very interesting that over the past two years that every female that you have labeled ‘lower-functioning” has been a Black female.” He quickly interrupted me with, “No. That’s not true.” I just as quickly reminded him not to interrupt me when I am talking because I did not interrupt him. I stated, “It is very true. I have never heard you refer to a white client or a Hispanic client as being lower functioning. He interrupted again by saying, “You don’t what you are talking about.” I responded, “Yes. I do!” This is when my boss intervened as suggested that we end the discussion before it got really ugly in that meeting.
Well, I was done with it. This nut job even had the audacity to try to shake my hand after the meeting was over. Anyway, I felt a great relief after I had finally gotten that off of my chest. Now whether or not I have a job on tomorrow, Monday the 10th, that’s another story, LOL!! Anyway, as I was headed home after an obvious long day at work, I saw this woman trying to push her stalled car out of the way of flowing traffic. I pulled into the parking lot of the Popeye’s that I was headed to (don’t judge me! lol) and got out of my car to see what her situation was and then I proceeded to walk towards her to offer my help. Then, all of a sudden, she gave the car a big push in reverse and then attempted to jump back inside and steer her car out of traffic. I made it there just as she has slammed her door. I told her to stay inside of the care as I began to push. When I began pushing the car a young Mexican man walked by and asked if he could help and said yes. Then a second older Mexican man joined in on the pushing. We safely guided her out of traffic and into the Popeye’s parking lot.
Well, she got out of her call and thanked me. She stated that she thought something was wrong with ignition or at least she hoped that it was just a case of her running out of gas and nothing more serious. We shared a quick laugh about how she was really getting her hustle on trying to push that car out of traffic. I even mimicked the way she gave her stalled car a quick, hard push and tried to jump in it like a go cart. LOL! We both laughed our asses off in the parking lot before I offered to drive her to the nearest gas station to fill up her gasoline container. She thanked me for being there to help her. She said that I was a blessing and she did not know what she was going to do. I said thank you. She went on to say, “You know being a single woman out here, you gotta do what you gotta do when you don’t have a man to help you. I replied, “I hear ya.” When made back to her car and it turned out that all she needed was gas. She cranked her car up with the biggest sigh of relief on her face. She told me thank you again and I told her no problem. She said, “Look, I still want to give you something. I want to buy some chicken (referring to Popeye’s). I quickly told her, “No. I’m good. I am just glad I was able to help.” This is how I give back to the universe. It will come back to me the same way I put it in the universe” “You can thank me by helping someone the same way I helped you.” She said sternly, but with an appreciative smile, “I know, but I still want you have this.” I reluctantly accepted her monetary gesture of thanks and wished her a good evening.
On this past Saturday afternoon, I was privileged to attend an annual block party that is hosted by this non-profit organization called APAA, (Association of Persons Affected by Addictions) which is located in downtown Dallas in the medical district. APAA has a relationship with the company that I work for in that as soon as the clients are discharged after having recieved four months of in-patient residential treatment with us, APAA offers them after care services such as Narcotics Anonmous groups, DRA (Dual Recovery Anonymous) groups and Alcoholics Anonymous groups as well as getiting them connected to much needed support services in the Dallas area.
I hung out for about three hours listening to guest speakers share their stories of courage, strength, and hope since winning their personal battles with alcohol and drug addiction. I am often inspired whenever I get the opportunity to hear an ex-addict and/or alcoholic speak their truth. The time I spent at the block party also served as a reunion of sorts for me and some former clients of the agency where I work. I was so happy to see how well they were doing out here in society being clean, sober, and on their proper medications. It warmed my heart to hear them tell me how much they appreciated me for helping them make it at the agency. It made me feel even better when many of them would say, “Thank you, Mr. Rico for all that you taught me while I was at that place. I learned a lot from your groups.” All and all, I had a good day. However, they also shared with me stories of the many that have not been so fortunate while out here in society. A lot of others have either gone back to using drugs or have been re-arrested and sentenced to serve jail time by the courts.
Well, in this line of work, one has to be able to take the good with the bad. You learn to cherish the good news, while you continue to try to prevent the bad everyday you go to work. The visit to the sober block party served as a great balance and end of work week stress reliever. Where I work, I don’t really get to see the results of my contributions to the mental health field. I don’t really get to see the results of a day to day grind working to encourage and even convince a certain population of people that has mostly experienced hurt, disappointment, rejection and even abandonment in the lives that even though they have gone through so much in their lives a better and brighter day is very close on the horizon. I let them know often that even though their drug usage and mental illness diagnosis have caused some people in society to look down on them and even shun them in public, its ok. It’s ok that some people won’t let go of the old you. That’s cool too. You can let them have the old you because you have been blessed to be in total control of the new you and ain’t a damn thing they can do about it.
This past weekend served as an affirmation that I am where I am supposed to be. I am supposed to be in the helping field. I am supposed to be where others who are down and need a little help getting back up can reach up and grab my hand. I am supposed to be a social worker. I am supposed to be a counselor. I am supposed to be a skilled helper. I am exactly where the Creator wants be to be. I wish the same for all of you who took time out to read my story.
Sunday, September 02, 2012
Do Rapper Seem to Hate Black People? An Open Letter to Rap Lovers
I am writing this letter with hopes of reaching the souls and the intellect of those in this country and across the world whom are sensitive to the plight of people of Afrikan descent living in America. I will get right down to the point of this letter. I have grown sick and tired of most rappers lyrically attacking Black men and Black women in their raps. Since the murder of rapper, Tupac Shakur, about sixteen years ago, there seems to have been an overflow of rappers whose sole purpose for being in the rap game is to amass monetary and material gains that had been made readily available to them through this particular music medium called rappin’. This, however, is not a huge crime in my book. In fact, making all the money you can is the philosophy of the very system under which we all exist and operate under, which is called capitalism.
My problem is when the rappers use Black people as a violent stepping-stone to reach their economical goals. I have a problem when most rappers today seem to willingly participate out of greed, self hatred, and ignorance in the perpetuation of negative images of Black people in order to gain a buck or get handed a piece of jewelry. I am very well aware of who is in control of the money at the record labels that aid and even encourages the proliferation of violence against Black men and women through the lyrics and imagery of the rap music that is being purchased and mentally absorbed in bulks all over the world. Trust me. None of the people that control rap music and the distribution of rap music look like Diddy, Jay-Z, 50 Cent or even Russell Simmons. If you need to know what these people look like, you are obviously among the mentally walking dead.
I have observed that whenever there is an attempt made to address violent images in the rap industry in a forum or in a letter to the editor type situation, rap middle men like Russell Simmons, as well as, the performers of this brand of rap music, always come up with some bull-shit line about rap music not being the sole cause of some of the ills that plague the neighbor “hoods” where a lot of Black American youths and families live and play. These people actually try to defend the relevance of the crap that they puke up on the MIC, on each CD, and in most live concerts. This is the one line that kills me the most, “If it were not for rapping and the rap game, most young Black men would not be able to get out of the “hood” or even be able to feed their families.” Hmmm, I wonder how thousands and even millions of Black people in this country made strides and overcame enormous obstacles to become successful in the past without having to resort to destroying their own people in the process?
Amazingly, most of these strides were made during the height of Jim Crow (segregation laws) and public lynching. I think determination, education, creativity, self-love, racial/cultural knowledge of self, and guts had a lot to do with it. I am of the opinion that many of the brothers and sisters in today’s society tend to be weak and lacking in those characteristics mentioned a couple of lines earlier. Most of today’s rappers seem to possess the attitude of “not giving a damn” about anybody that looks like them when it comes to making music. It is almost as if most of the Black male rappers are handed a prepared script by White and Jew-ish owned record companies to follow if they want to become what is now viewed as being "a success" in the rap industry. Hell, even Latino rappers like Fat Joe have used the word Nigger in their music. However, I have never hear any of them of them disrespect Latinos by using the racist word for Latinos, Spik in their music. There are also some Hispanic rappers who use the racist word Nigger in their raps, but they never use the racist words Wetback, Fench Jumper, or River Swimmer to disrepect follow Mexicans/Hispanics.
It makes me sick when a right wing Conservative like a Bill O’Reilly, has to let us (Black people) know when one among us is making us look like shit in the eyes of the world. I could not care less about that piss-ant, Bill O’Reilly, but I think he told the truth and also did us (the Black community) a favor some years back when he convinced Pepsi to drop Ludacris from its commercials. I think Russell Simmons should have never gotten involved that particular issue. In getting in the middle of that particular situation, I think Russell Simmons sent out an incorrect message to Black youths and people in general that chicken and coonin’ is cool and we should strive to do that because it gets you paid. I am tired of Black male rappers calling Black men Niggers and going along with the portraying of us as pimps and gangstaz in their rap songs while going along with the proliferation of that image in their music videos.
I am also tired of them referring to Black women as hoes, bitches, chickens and whatever else they come up with that is totally opposite of what God created. I am sick of the rationales and excuses they give for the attack on Black. Here is one of my favorites “Man, it is just entertainment.” That is the same bullshit line that’s used by so many of the d-jays and on-air radio personalities in Memphis, Dallas, Atlanta, New York and across the country who play these songs over the air. These same d-jays also use this line, “It’s my job to give the people what they want to hear.” They will say anything to justify “selling out” and to keep a job on the air. Anyway, my challenge to rappers who attack Black people in their lyrics is to either stop the madness and destruction or to at least write and produce raps that attack all ethic and racial groups equally instead of just mainly concentrating on Black people. There are even white rappers who use the word Nigger in their raps, but have yet to use the word cracker, honkey or white racist pig in their music to disrespect white people.
In saying this, those particular rappers can continue to “entertain us” with raps that contain violent and racist lyrics. It is definitely their right to do so. I am not one to trample on anyone’s right to freedom of speech and/or freedom of expression. However, in the spirit of “keepin’ it real” and equally entertaining the masses, I would like to begin hearing lyrics that refer to White Jews as Hymies and Kykes, Mexicans as Wetbacks, Anglo Saxon Whites as Crackers, Honkeys, devils, and peckerwoods, Latinos as Spiks, Italians as WOPs, Native Americans as Chiefs and Redskins, and Asians as Slant eyes, Gooks, and Charlie. Hey, it is all “entertainment,” right? I would like to begin hearing Black male rappers rap about shooting up a synagogue since they love to rap about shooting up a club where Black people gather in large numbers for the purpose of “entertainment.”
I would like to begin hearing Black rappers refer to Anglo Saxon Whites and White Jew-ish women as bitches and hoes they plan to pimp and even smack around. After creating these particular songs in the studio and put out as singles, I want to see the videos made that will reflect these images. Moreover, I would like to these same Black Hispanic, Latino, and white Deejays in Memphis, Dallas, Atlanta, New York and across the country play these songs over the air for every one to hear and to bounce to. Since we are talking about giving the people what they want to hear, making money, and “entertaining” people, I hope this suggestion of “equality in music” does not take very long before I start hearing it bumping across our radio airways, in our car speakers, with the video images appearing on our television screens. Wow, I can almost feel the panic in the room as I complete this letter. I can just imagine people saying, “Is Rico saying that we should start being racist towards white people and Hispanics?” “That’s crazy!” No, that is not what I am saying nor what this letter was about. I am just asking a question based on observations.
My problem is when the rappers use Black people as a violent stepping-stone to reach their economical goals. I have a problem when most rappers today seem to willingly participate out of greed, self hatred, and ignorance in the perpetuation of negative images of Black people in order to gain a buck or get handed a piece of jewelry. I am very well aware of who is in control of the money at the record labels that aid and even encourages the proliferation of violence against Black men and women through the lyrics and imagery of the rap music that is being purchased and mentally absorbed in bulks all over the world. Trust me. None of the people that control rap music and the distribution of rap music look like Diddy, Jay-Z, 50 Cent or even Russell Simmons. If you need to know what these people look like, you are obviously among the mentally walking dead.
I have observed that whenever there is an attempt made to address violent images in the rap industry in a forum or in a letter to the editor type situation, rap middle men like Russell Simmons, as well as, the performers of this brand of rap music, always come up with some bull-shit line about rap music not being the sole cause of some of the ills that plague the neighbor “hoods” where a lot of Black American youths and families live and play. These people actually try to defend the relevance of the crap that they puke up on the MIC, on each CD, and in most live concerts. This is the one line that kills me the most, “If it were not for rapping and the rap game, most young Black men would not be able to get out of the “hood” or even be able to feed their families.” Hmmm, I wonder how thousands and even millions of Black people in this country made strides and overcame enormous obstacles to become successful in the past without having to resort to destroying their own people in the process?
Amazingly, most of these strides were made during the height of Jim Crow (segregation laws) and public lynching. I think determination, education, creativity, self-love, racial/cultural knowledge of self, and guts had a lot to do with it. I am of the opinion that many of the brothers and sisters in today’s society tend to be weak and lacking in those characteristics mentioned a couple of lines earlier. Most of today’s rappers seem to possess the attitude of “not giving a damn” about anybody that looks like them when it comes to making music. It is almost as if most of the Black male rappers are handed a prepared script by White and Jew-ish owned record companies to follow if they want to become what is now viewed as being "a success" in the rap industry. Hell, even Latino rappers like Fat Joe have used the word Nigger in their music. However, I have never hear any of them of them disrespect Latinos by using the racist word for Latinos, Spik in their music. There are also some Hispanic rappers who use the racist word Nigger in their raps, but they never use the racist words Wetback, Fench Jumper, or River Swimmer to disrepect follow Mexicans/Hispanics.
It makes me sick when a right wing Conservative like a Bill O’Reilly, has to let us (Black people) know when one among us is making us look like shit in the eyes of the world. I could not care less about that piss-ant, Bill O’Reilly, but I think he told the truth and also did us (the Black community) a favor some years back when he convinced Pepsi to drop Ludacris from its commercials. I think Russell Simmons should have never gotten involved that particular issue. In getting in the middle of that particular situation, I think Russell Simmons sent out an incorrect message to Black youths and people in general that chicken and coonin’ is cool and we should strive to do that because it gets you paid. I am tired of Black male rappers calling Black men Niggers and going along with the portraying of us as pimps and gangstaz in their rap songs while going along with the proliferation of that image in their music videos.
I am also tired of them referring to Black women as hoes, bitches, chickens and whatever else they come up with that is totally opposite of what God created. I am sick of the rationales and excuses they give for the attack on Black. Here is one of my favorites “Man, it is just entertainment.” That is the same bullshit line that’s used by so many of the d-jays and on-air radio personalities in Memphis, Dallas, Atlanta, New York and across the country who play these songs over the air. These same d-jays also use this line, “It’s my job to give the people what they want to hear.” They will say anything to justify “selling out” and to keep a job on the air. Anyway, my challenge to rappers who attack Black people in their lyrics is to either stop the madness and destruction or to at least write and produce raps that attack all ethic and racial groups equally instead of just mainly concentrating on Black people. There are even white rappers who use the word Nigger in their raps, but have yet to use the word cracker, honkey or white racist pig in their music to disrespect white people.
In saying this, those particular rappers can continue to “entertain us” with raps that contain violent and racist lyrics. It is definitely their right to do so. I am not one to trample on anyone’s right to freedom of speech and/or freedom of expression. However, in the spirit of “keepin’ it real” and equally entertaining the masses, I would like to begin hearing lyrics that refer to White Jews as Hymies and Kykes, Mexicans as Wetbacks, Anglo Saxon Whites as Crackers, Honkeys, devils, and peckerwoods, Latinos as Spiks, Italians as WOPs, Native Americans as Chiefs and Redskins, and Asians as Slant eyes, Gooks, and Charlie. Hey, it is all “entertainment,” right? I would like to begin hearing Black male rappers rap about shooting up a synagogue since they love to rap about shooting up a club where Black people gather in large numbers for the purpose of “entertainment.”
I would like to begin hearing Black rappers refer to Anglo Saxon Whites and White Jew-ish women as bitches and hoes they plan to pimp and even smack around. After creating these particular songs in the studio and put out as singles, I want to see the videos made that will reflect these images. Moreover, I would like to these same Black Hispanic, Latino, and white Deejays in Memphis, Dallas, Atlanta, New York and across the country play these songs over the air for every one to hear and to bounce to. Since we are talking about giving the people what they want to hear, making money, and “entertaining” people, I hope this suggestion of “equality in music” does not take very long before I start hearing it bumping across our radio airways, in our car speakers, with the video images appearing on our television screens. Wow, I can almost feel the panic in the room as I complete this letter. I can just imagine people saying, “Is Rico saying that we should start being racist towards white people and Hispanics?” “That’s crazy!” No, that is not what I am saying nor what this letter was about. I am just asking a question based on observations.
Sunday, August 26, 2012
All I did was ask a question
You know as one who has worked in mental health in various capacities since 1996, I am always questioning our mental health as a people. I am always seemingly asking “the wrong questions” about society, race, and the black community, which in turn has caused people (many in my race) to react in aggressive and sadly, in unforgiving ways. My intent has never and will never be to cause harm or pain. My intent has always been to seek clarity for the sake of my own mental health stability as well as to get an understanding to what mental state our people are in even in 2012. I remember asking a question of one of my teachers back in high school who was also the coordinator of our year book staff. I went to Frayser High School from 1986 to 1988 which was becoming a racially mixed high school at the time because before then, the school was mainly white. I asked Miss Savare who was a very light-skinned sista with very dark hair and dark eyes. She was cute and had this sexy southern accent. I thought she was Creole or something. Anyway, one day in the 10 th or 11th grade after having gone through one of the completed year books, I asked Miss Savare, “How come even though our high school is evenly mixed, (45 percent Black, 50 percent white, and 5 percent others) the pages in the yearbook have over 90 percent pictures of white students in them?’ She looked at me (with her face having turned a little red) and responded, “Marico, if you don’t like how the year book looks, then join the year book staff!”
Of course, I was like, “Dang, she did not have to get all snappy.” However she did make a good suggestion. Her suggestion now reminds me of what so many people have said and still say today, “You have to become a part of “the system” to make changes from within.” So, I joined the yearbook staff with the intent to make a difference. I got my camera, my roll of film, and I was on my way to make a change in the way the yearbook looked. Well, I took a lot of pictures of black students and some whites, but mainly Black students. I turned in my roll to be developed and to be added to the next year book. Well, when I got the new year book only three of my pictures of Black students made the yearbook and the book was again 90 percent white. This is when I learned that the philosophy becoming a part of the system to make changes was a load of crap. Hell, we have had Black politicians (elected and appointed) and things still have remained the same for Black people in this country. Justice is still fleeting and economic equality still eludes us. Yes, a small few have squeezed through a crack but that’s it.
Anyway, back to me seemingly asking the wrong questions. When I got college, I seemed to ask the wrong questions a lot. I could not help it. There were a lot of things that I was curious about. Me asking questions about people, groups and people’s beliefs back in college caused a lot of anger in a lot of people back then. I was often curious about what would cause such a reaction. Whenever I questioned the validity of religion in our community, I would really get it. LOL!! Today, I try not to ask so many specific questions in our community because I have learned that there is much work to be done. I still have these curiosities about what makes us tick the way we do, but I have learned to keep certain questions to myself or only share them with my very small group of friends who are just as curious as I am about the mental health state of Black people. Believe or not. I have never asked these certain questions to create controversy or to create enemies out of people I never really knew in the first place.
In my mind, I always thought that I was sharing what I had learned from reading and getting a true understanding about how things work in this reality. Well, I have been told and shown loudly and clearly that my brand of sharing does not help in the movement for progress and independence. So, this is why for the past four years I have been mainly just doing the work that is needed and not asking so many questions. I guess I don’t have any more questions really. I have asked so many questions that I all need to be doing now is just taking the answers that I have been given and accepting them as the peoples’ truth and move on. It has been hard just moving on, but it does make life a little easier when you are able to focus more on yourself and just let others “do them.” I no longer have to question the mental health of Black people today, I got it. I now understand.
My job now is to get more involved and become even more a part of the solution. My contribution to the stabilization of the mental health of Black people is to continue doing my part as a counselor and social worker in the healing of hurt feelings, trauma, anger, depression, low-self esteem, and disappointment in our men. Ladies, I am saying our men because I don’t want to see another woman being hurt from unknowingly connecting with a hurt man.
Sunday, August 19, 2012
“The Ideal Woman for me to date and possibly marry someday” By Rico Rivers
This list of was put together as a result of knowing exactly what I want in a permanent mate and a wife. First, please allow me to say this. I think that all women are beautiful the way they in which they were created by God. However, I do have a preference for the certain type of woman that I would like to someday be living in the same house with and/or sharing the same bed with exclusively and permanently. This is not a search for a perfect woman. I repeat. This is not a search for a perfect woman. This woman does not exist. However, the perfect woman for me is definitely out there somewhere.
This is the description of what we all possess, which is called a preference. However, in the meantime, as a single man out here casually and safely dating, the only preference or preferences that I have is for the Black woman to not be too old, not be out of my weight range of preference or my physical body type of preference, Oh yeah, and not have a nasty and negative attitude.
Below is a compiled list of my preference (s) for a permanent mate or wife and not a casual dating partner or friend with benefits.
Race: Black/Afrikan/Afrikan-American- However, if she is mixed with other ethnicities such as Mexican, Puerto Rican, Asian, Dominican, etc. She is cool too as long as she is brown or dark and speaks English very well.
Height: 4’11 to 5’5
Weight: 115-130 (This is the weight I prefer before she has had children)
Age: 32-36 years old and NO CHILDREN! I might make an acception for one small child. The father has to be dead, serving a life sentence in jail, or just be totally out of the picture. No time for baby daddy drama.
Body Type: SLIM, SLENDER, MEDIUM and PETITE, but with a toned, Curvy/Athletic build; Flat stomach (six pack or just plain flat) shapely legs, Apple-Bottom Butt (no flat boodie, please!) No stretch marks on the stomach or scars all over the legs and face. I like bow-legged or straight legged. No knocked knees or sleuth feet please!!
Skin Tone: Smooth Chocolate, Fudge, Pitch or Puff of Smoke (She can be of mixed ethnic heritage just as long as she is brown or darker (see preferred skin-tones above)
Hair Type: Natural! No Chemical Relaxers! (Twists, locs, braids, or naturally curly/wavy hair). Hair color must be naturally brown or coal black. No hair coloring! This includes tints and high-lights! However, I am open to highlights within normal reason.
Skin Type: Little or no make-up (naturally beautiful)
Eye Color: Brown or darker (No color contacts). However, if she is BORN with a different eye color, it is okay.
Dress/Appearance: Casual, but not boring- (lots of flava). Sexy, but not slutty. Elegant, but not stuffy.
Hygiene: Nice smile, clear eyes (not blood shot). Bathes regularly and wears nice smelling deodorants, nice smelling perfumes and soft scented oils.
Body Art: ABSOLUTELY NO TATTOOS! Dark skinned people have no business wearing tattoos. You can’t see them anyway. Tats on dark skinned people tend to look like dark smudges. Piercing in ears only! However, I would make an exception with a nipple piercings, navel piercing, and a small, cute nose piercing
Education: Have at least a Bachelors degree. Of course, higher degrees are cool too. A woman who has read books that speaks on the plight of Afrikan Americans in this country. She is also very aware of what Racism/White Supremacy is and its purpose or agenda.
Employment: Makes at least $30,000 a year. More per year is cool too. Even if she made more money than me, I am fine with that. I am not intimidated by a woman that makes more money than me. However, don’t annoy me with this should you do make more than I do.
Personality/Attitude: Down to earth, but talkative. Open-minded. Good sense of humor, but not goofy. Must be tolerant of others, including me, but not a push-over. A take charge woman, but not a control freak. I already have a mother. I don’t need another one. I love a woman that shows affection (even in public) towards her man.
Character: Honesty, Dignity and Integrity.
She has to be a motivator. She believes in sticking by her man through thick and thin. However, I don’t expect her to stay around if I should ever cheat on her, which is not a part of my character anyway. I won’t stay around if she cheats on me. She has to be a considerate person and not a selfish, spoiled, little girl. Non-Materialist.
Beliefs: Non-Christian!!!! Non-Religious!!! At All!!!
A Spiritualist, but not a fanatic about it! (Afrikan-Centered is a plus!)
Sexuality: I need her to be straight, not gay or bi-sexual or bi-curious. I want her to be open and very secure in her “straight” sexuality. I need her to enjoy sex just as much as I do, if not more. It’s going down!!!
Sexuality Continued: Also, she has to have not dated, kissed or had sex/sexual relations of any kind with any EUROPEAN! (Spaniard, Italian, Portuguese, German, Jew-ish or a WASP –White Anglo Saxon Protestant). In other words, No white man, PERIOD!! I am firm believer in whoever you “lay down with” who you share their philosophy.
Most Importantly: I would like this Black woman to be a woman that loves, respects, and adores her father and BLACK MEN!! Especially those of us Black men who have been labeled militants because we don’t have a problem with speaking our minds and standing up for what is right when it comes to Black people and race.
Diet/Exercise: I would like for this ideal woman be pork free as well as red meat (Beef) free. Since, I presently eat turkey, chicken, and some fish; I don’t have a problem with her eating these foods. However, I am on a vegetarian path and I would prefer that she be on the same path as well. At least be open to the idea. Also, I would prefer that she also be dairy free. I would love for my ideal woman to take her physical health/ and emotional health seriously. I love for her to have an ACTIVE gym membership or have her own workout regime that she does at home. It would be great if she loves to run because I love to run.
Politically: It would be nice if she were an independent.
Social Affiliation: I prefer her not to be a member of any social (so-called black Greek) organizations. This includes any other Boule’(boo-lay) organizations such as, the Links, Jack N Jill, etc. However, I would not hold it against her as long as she is Afrikan-Centered in her thinking and her beliefs.
One more small thing: She has to be a brown or dark-skinned female that does not have issues with being brown or dark-skinned. She has to be a brown or dark-skinned female that is attracted to brown and dark-skinned men. Finally, she is not afraid to give birth to brown or dark-skinned babies with this brown or dark-skinned man.
This is the description of what we all possess, which is called a preference. However, in the meantime, as a single man out here casually and safely dating, the only preference or preferences that I have is for the Black woman to not be too old, not be out of my weight range of preference or my physical body type of preference, Oh yeah, and not have a nasty and negative attitude.
Below is a compiled list of my preference (s) for a permanent mate or wife and not a casual dating partner or friend with benefits.
Race: Black/Afrikan/Afrikan-American- However, if she is mixed with other ethnicities such as Mexican, Puerto Rican, Asian, Dominican, etc. She is cool too as long as she is brown or dark and speaks English very well.
Height: 4’11 to 5’5
Weight: 115-130 (This is the weight I prefer before she has had children)
Age: 32-36 years old and NO CHILDREN! I might make an acception for one small child. The father has to be dead, serving a life sentence in jail, or just be totally out of the picture. No time for baby daddy drama.
Body Type: SLIM, SLENDER, MEDIUM and PETITE, but with a toned, Curvy/Athletic build; Flat stomach (six pack or just plain flat) shapely legs, Apple-Bottom Butt (no flat boodie, please!) No stretch marks on the stomach or scars all over the legs and face. I like bow-legged or straight legged. No knocked knees or sleuth feet please!!
Skin Tone: Smooth Chocolate, Fudge, Pitch or Puff of Smoke (She can be of mixed ethnic heritage just as long as she is brown or darker (see preferred skin-tones above)
Hair Type: Natural! No Chemical Relaxers! (Twists, locs, braids, or naturally curly/wavy hair). Hair color must be naturally brown or coal black. No hair coloring! This includes tints and high-lights! However, I am open to highlights within normal reason.
Skin Type: Little or no make-up (naturally beautiful)
Eye Color: Brown or darker (No color contacts). However, if she is BORN with a different eye color, it is okay.
Dress/Appearance: Casual, but not boring- (lots of flava). Sexy, but not slutty. Elegant, but not stuffy.
Hygiene: Nice smile, clear eyes (not blood shot). Bathes regularly and wears nice smelling deodorants, nice smelling perfumes and soft scented oils.
Body Art: ABSOLUTELY NO TATTOOS! Dark skinned people have no business wearing tattoos. You can’t see them anyway. Tats on dark skinned people tend to look like dark smudges. Piercing in ears only! However, I would make an exception with a nipple piercings, navel piercing, and a small, cute nose piercing
Education: Have at least a Bachelors degree. Of course, higher degrees are cool too. A woman who has read books that speaks on the plight of Afrikan Americans in this country. She is also very aware of what Racism/White Supremacy is and its purpose or agenda.
Employment: Makes at least $30,000 a year. More per year is cool too. Even if she made more money than me, I am fine with that. I am not intimidated by a woman that makes more money than me. However, don’t annoy me with this should you do make more than I do.
Personality/Attitude: Down to earth, but talkative. Open-minded. Good sense of humor, but not goofy. Must be tolerant of others, including me, but not a push-over. A take charge woman, but not a control freak. I already have a mother. I don’t need another one. I love a woman that shows affection (even in public) towards her man.
Character: Honesty, Dignity and Integrity.
She has to be a motivator. She believes in sticking by her man through thick and thin. However, I don’t expect her to stay around if I should ever cheat on her, which is not a part of my character anyway. I won’t stay around if she cheats on me. She has to be a considerate person and not a selfish, spoiled, little girl. Non-Materialist.
Beliefs: Non-Christian!!!! Non-Religious!!! At All!!!
A Spiritualist, but not a fanatic about it! (Afrikan-Centered is a plus!)
Sexuality: I need her to be straight, not gay or bi-sexual or bi-curious. I want her to be open and very secure in her “straight” sexuality. I need her to enjoy sex just as much as I do, if not more. It’s going down!!!
Sexuality Continued: Also, she has to have not dated, kissed or had sex/sexual relations of any kind with any EUROPEAN! (Spaniard, Italian, Portuguese, German, Jew-ish or a WASP –White Anglo Saxon Protestant). In other words, No white man, PERIOD!! I am firm believer in whoever you “lay down with” who you share their philosophy.
Most Importantly: I would like this Black woman to be a woman that loves, respects, and adores her father and BLACK MEN!! Especially those of us Black men who have been labeled militants because we don’t have a problem with speaking our minds and standing up for what is right when it comes to Black people and race.
Diet/Exercise: I would like for this ideal woman be pork free as well as red meat (Beef) free. Since, I presently eat turkey, chicken, and some fish; I don’t have a problem with her eating these foods. However, I am on a vegetarian path and I would prefer that she be on the same path as well. At least be open to the idea. Also, I would prefer that she also be dairy free. I would love for my ideal woman to take her physical health/ and emotional health seriously. I love for her to have an ACTIVE gym membership or have her own workout regime that she does at home. It would be great if she loves to run because I love to run.
Politically: It would be nice if she were an independent.
Social Affiliation: I prefer her not to be a member of any social (so-called black Greek) organizations. This includes any other Boule’(boo-lay) organizations such as, the Links, Jack N Jill, etc. However, I would not hold it against her as long as she is Afrikan-Centered in her thinking and her beliefs.
One more small thing: She has to be a brown or dark-skinned female that does not have issues with being brown or dark-skinned. She has to be a brown or dark-skinned female that is attracted to brown and dark-skinned men. Finally, she is not afraid to give birth to brown or dark-skinned babies with this brown or dark-skinned man.
Sunday, August 12, 2012
The 2012 Summer Olympics: Highs and Lows
I have not been an avid viewer of the Olympic Games since I was little and people like Carl Lewis, Mary Lou Retton, and Greg Louganis were the champions America was cheering for during the summer games of 1984 and 1988. I guess since I was never a huge fan of sports growing up, the Olympic Games just kind of fell by the wayside on my list of things that I found to be interesting over the years. However, I will admit this one fact. I did, however, sneak a peek at the summer games over the years whenever I just happened to walk past a television at home or wherever I was when track and field was on and the women’s volley ball team was going for the gold. I did cheer for Carl Lewis. I cheered for Gale Devers, and I lusted and I cheered “at the same damn time” whenever Florence Griffith- Joyner (Flo-Jo) was getting ready to do her historic thing in the track and field completion. I would not be keeping it real, it I did not admit that I had a huge crush on Mary Lou Retton back then. She was really cute and she had “the smile” that warmed America’s heart including mine. She also killed the competition in the gymnastics portion of the games.
That same magic, charisma and “that smile” would be reborn in the spirit and presence of OUR very own Gabriel Douglas in the 2012 Olympic Games. I cheered for her as often as I get in front of my television set at home, which was almost nightly. This year’s summer games kind of caught me off guard because I had no intentions of watching the games, but then, I heard some guys talking about the Brazilian women’s volley ball team. That struck a chord in me. I found myself trying to catch one of the matches so I can get in on the excitement. Well, in the process of trying to catch the women’s volley ball matches, I was hit with an explosion called Shelly Ann Fraser Pryce and the rest of the women’s track and field. Carmelita Jeter also had me distracted for most of the games, but I did regain focus at some point so that I could realize who else was in those races competing with her and Shelly Ann Fraser Pryce.
I became hooked on this year’s Olympics by way of women’s track and field, women’s indoor volley ball, and of course, gymnastic because little Gabby was kicking butt. If she was not competing, I did not watch the gymnastics competition. I also got a chance to check out the men’s track and field. The 34 year old brother, from the Dominican Republic, Felix Sanchez killed them in the 400 meters hurdles. He has won the only two gold medals the Caribbean island country has in all. Talk about representing for one’s country. Then, you have Usain Bolt of Jamaica who went on track and field greatness with his record breaking all around performance in track and field. Now, if he could just shut his mouth up about Carl Lewis, I can still respect him as an athlete who did his thing at this year’s Olympics.
Finally, I want to end this article by touching on the “hair issue” that created a firestorm of controversy in the black community and even all over the world. There were some tweets sent out concerning gold medal winning Olympian, Gabriel Douglas about the “look” or the “status” of her hair during the competition. The issue that Black women and Black men have with OUR hair is nothing new. Hell, I was shocked that there were no comments tweeted about her having chocolate skin. I guess there may actually be some growth somewhere in our community and in the world. I cannot focus on the obvious comments about Gabriel Douglas’s hair supposedly not being very representative of Black people in the Olympics without mentioning a little history first. Black hair in its original form (the hair that God gave us) has always been a political issue as well as being a source that drew rage, fear, and even envy from our white oppressors.
History has taught me that when the first group of captured Afrikans was brought to the Americas to be placed in chattel slavery, they were stripped naked and shaved bald. This was done to add credence to the lies and myths that Afrikans were uncivilized savages who ran around the continent naked and acted like wild animals. The next 300 years would be spent convincing the enslaved Afrikans that nothing about them had any significance. Everything was ugly and was a curse from the god they force fed the enslaved Afrikans. They were made to feel badly about having full lips, wide noses, dark skin, large hips, big butts, and yes, their natural hair. Of course, as the Africans were becoming convinced that their bodies were ugly and cursed, the plantation owners and overseers perform every lustful, degenerate, degrading sexual act that he could think of on the capture women and the captured men. Yes. Homosexuality has a root on the old slave plantations in America.
Anyway, after 300 years of this torture and cruelty, this country puts the so-called newly freed Afrikans through 100 more years of legalized discrimination and segregation that came to be known as JIM CROW laws of the south. The laws placed even more psychological trauma on the minds of Blacks in this country. We were even convinced that we did not look right unless we looked white. However, I must remind everybody that America is south of Canada. I know that some people tend to only want to believe that only the southern part the of the United States mistreated Blacks. This is not true. The entire country mistreated blacks. This is why most of the slaves who escaped to freedom fled to Canada, not Chicago. Now, during this time, the self-hatred training has set in pretty good. We are now on “automatic self hatred.”
Here we are in 2012 with that same self hatred that was forced on us by our former enslaver and oppressor. The response to Gabby’s hair is a direct result of this psychological training that has yet to be corrected and treated. Until we clinically and educationally treat this psychological trauma and undo this 400 year mental training (spell), we will continue to “act out” and “act up” with each other and in our communities. I know that many of us in the Black community have tried other remedies to get rid of the symptoms of slavery, such as denial, pleading ignorance, interracial marriages, classism, going along to get along, and even Jesus Christ. However, until we sit down and deal with root cause of OUR issues with ourselves, we will continue to indirectly shit on great moments such as Gabriel Douglas making history at the 2012 summer Olympics all because her hair was not “straight” enough to represent black people in the Olympic completion.
For all those who actually felt this way, shame on you. When a person is working out or competing in a sport, the body sweats, including the scalp. Whenever I go to the gym, I rarely see Black women there. I see women of all other races and ethnicities up in there on the treadmill, the stair master, hitting the weights, swimming, and doing aerobics. However, when I go out to restaurants, bars, and nightclubs where food and liquor are served, I see Black women all over the place. I am still trying to figure out when it was the last time I saw a Black woman where tennis shoes. Anyway, congratulations to Gabriel Douglas, Carmelita Jeter, Shelly Ann Fraser-Pryce, Felix Sanchez, Usain Bolt, and of course, I can’t leave out Michael Phelps for making history as having won the most medals at the Olympics.
Sunday, June 03, 2012
“Does Child Sexual Abuse Mean Anything to Most Black People?”
Child rape, child molestation, and child sexual abuse...However you want to say it is REAL. It happens in a lot of families. It happens to children of all racial and ethnic backgrounds. As a matter of fact, according to the website,www. childhelp.org, “Every year 3.3 million reports of child abuse are made in the United States involving 6 million children; that’s because reports can include multiple children.” However, it seems that this issue is one that is most often swept under the rug in this country. The victim is often vilified by family members, members of their immediate community and even people in society that don’t even know them personally when he or she finally breaks the silence about abuse that has happened to them.
I am bringing this up because in the Black community, many of us seem to either bury our heads in the sand or outwardly attack the victim of child rape or sexual abuse when the person being accused is a celebrity we like. Yeah. I know. We are not the only ones who react this way. Celebrity and Jewish film director, Woody Allen, is a child rapist who was protected and forgiven by the white and Jewish community when ex-wife Mia Farrow broke her silence about him molesting their then adopted underage Asian daughter Soon Ye some years back. This sicko even went so far as to mary his child victim when she became of legal age. Next, there was French director, Roman Polanski. He allegedly drugged and raped an under aged teen girl at his home back in the 1970’s. When the silence was broken and his ass was about to face rape charges that would have sent him to jail for a long time, he fled the country. While in exile, he still received Oscar awards from the white film academy for directing.
In the Black community, many of us gave R. Kelly a major pass after he raped and pissed on a 13 year old black girl on a home produced video/movie because we like the way he sings and we enjoy the booty-shaking music he produces. During the R. Kelly trial and even after his very suspicious and questionable aquittal, Black people even went so far as to declare war on anyone, including the underage girl for pointing a verbal or physical finger of guilt and shame at the RnB singing child rapist. Now, for the past couple of years or so, former member of the RnB singing and dance group B2K, Raz B. has been breaking his silence on the sexual abuse he and fellow members of his old group were force to endure when they were little dudes in the group back in the day. He named his child rapist, Chris Stokes, and also pointed out a few other people who either went along in silence with what was going on or who actually participated in the raping and molesting of him as well as other former group members.
He is the only one speaking out. The other former B2K members members have chosen to keep quiet. It has been reported in the news recently that RazB is coming out with a tell-all book and he is allegedly naming names of those who are gay in the industry, but hiding. Now, here is the deal. Raz B. may or may not be telling the truth about what happened to him. I am inclined to believe him. The music industry has always been reported as being a haven for sexual misconduct and sexual manipulation of artists by executives. Instead of giving Raz B the benefit of the doubt, many in the Black community have chosen to bury either their heads in the sand or outwardly attack him for stepping forward and breaking the silence with hopes of breaking the cycle of sexual abuse in the music industry. What is it? Why won’t WE stand with the victims when this happens? Why don’t many of us offer support and refuse when a child is raped by a celebrity? Are many of so star struck and have this hunger for fame and riches ourselves that we view people like Raz B. and the young lady in R. Kelly video as possible dream killers?
It leads one to believe that if we are so quick to jump and attack the victim when he or she accuses a celebrity or a rich person of being a child sexual predator, many in the Black community have even ignored the cries of child victims of sexual abuse in our very own households. We have really got to do better.
Monday, May 28, 2012
The Greatest Pain I Ever Felt (Part I)
The greatest pain I had ever felt occurred 20 years ago while I was a student at Grambling State University. I remember I was working nights, after class, at the university’s health center at night in the cleaning department as a participant in the university’s work study program to earn extra money to pay for food and other living expenses. I liked working there because when I would I would go on breaks, I would casually slip into one of the nurse’s offices and talk on the phone while my supervisor would be in the break room eating and talking with the nurses who were working the night shift. Well, this particular night, I discovered that I could make long distance phone calls courtesy of the health center. The first person I called was my favorite aunt in Dallas, Patricia. We started our conversation off talking about college and how everything was going for me. I asked about my cousins and other family members who also lived there in Dallas.
Then, we began to talk about the birth of my first niece, Sheila, by my younger sister, Tisha. I made the comment, “Aunt Pat, Sheila looks just like Tisha when she was a little girl.” “She sure does.” my aunt responded. My aunt went to something that would change my life forever. “You know, Rico, Sheila looks just like her mother the same way you looked like your father, Carl.” I paused for a moment. I suddenly felt this overwhelming sense of fear take control of my body. I cautiously asked, “Aunt Pat, don’t you mean Terry?” “Aunt, Pat, My father’s name is Terry.” At that very moment, I heard a jerk in her voice that I will never forget. It sounded as if she had been surprised by something or she had let something slip out of her mouth that had been a deep secret up until then. She did not even bother with trying to correct herself. She just came out with it. “Boy, your mother hasn’t told you yet?” She asked. I said, “No.” “Told me what?” Your mother hasn’t told that Carl Jackson is really your father and not Terry Richard?” I told her that this was the very first time I had heard this news. Needless to say our pleasant conversation had turned sour.
We attempted to carry on the conversation, but I just couldn’t. I believed at that time, she thought she had to continue to talk so I would not feel bad about her blurting out such a revelation the way she did, therefore attempting to explain the situation as much as she could. In my mind, she had said enough for one night. I let her off the hook by telling her that I was about to get off from work and I had to go. Before I hung up the phone, I had to ask her how this Carl Jackson person looked. She responded very quickly, but sensitively, Rico, go and take a look in the mirror. With that being said, we hung up. I immediately called my mother to get some answers because I was both hurt and curious the same time.
I immediately called my mother and told her what my aunt Pat had told me. Her response to what I told her pissed me off at the time because it seemed that all she was concerned about was her and her precious secret that got out. I told her that my aunt Pat had let it slip out that Terry wasn’t my biological father and instead a Carl Jackson gets the cigar. She angrily responded, “ Pat talks too damn much!” “She tells every damn thing!” She went on to rant and rave about how little the relationship meant to her when they dated the very short time all those years ago when they were teenagers. “There was nothing between us!” “I didn’t even like him!” “I don’t know what I was thinking!” “It was just something that happened and it was over!” “When I met Terry, Carl was not in the picture!” “I was already pregnant with you when I met Terry and he took care of you!” I interrupted her ranting and raving about herself to tell her that I was coming home the next day because I was not up to going to class the rest of the week.
We said our good-byes and hung up. I packed my books and left work early that night. I walked half way home in a daze. I was in total shock. I could not believe what had just happened to me. Here I am, twenty-two years old, and just now finding out that the man whom I was led to believe by my mother and the rest of my family to be my biological father, really wasn’t my biological father. I felt betrayed. I felt stupid. I felt alone. I felt a sense of not having an identity. I was angry at my mother for keeping this information away from me for what I perceived as selfish reasons. I felt a big gap opening up inside of me. Up until age twenty-two, I thought Terry Richard was my biological father. Trust. He was most certainly never a father to me growing up because I never saw him that often. I never really liked him because I had nothing in common with him. He was just the only connection I had as far as knowing who my father was. I had a sense of identity. I was content with the belief or the story that he was my father and I had even adjusted my life to this thinking. Now, that would all change. I wanted to know more about this Carl Jackson.
I remember walking across the campus on my way to the little trailer home that I rented at the time which was walking distance from campus still in a complete daze. I don’t think I noticed the other students on campus or even cars for that matter as I made my way across the yard. Suddenly, my daze was broken by the horn on a friend’s truck (Patrick Cooper) who offered me a ride home. When I hopped into the truck, I tried to act natural as if nothing was wrong. He asked me, “Wassup, man?” and I responded in what I thought was a calm way, “Nothing much.” He asked me if something was wrong and I just went into this stare, almost into a zone like stare. I began to speak slowly about my very recent experience with finding out about my real father. I guess I wasn’t quite ready to discuss it with anyone because the more I explained the sadder I became. I talked non-stop all the way home. While explaining my story, I felt myself beginning to breakdown in tears. I was able to hold them back until we pulled up into my driveway.
The tears came streaming down my face as I made my way out of the truck. “Take it easy man!” Patrick yelled out as I made my up to the front door of my trailer. I looked back with tears rolling down my face and responded in this hurt and quivering voice, “Okay, man! I will see you later!” I walked into my apartment and went directly to my bedroom and collapsed on the bed. I cried until I had no more crying left in me. I remember yelling, screaming, “How could this happen to me?” “Why me!?” That was one long, painful night of tears.
Then, we began to talk about the birth of my first niece, Sheila, by my younger sister, Tisha. I made the comment, “Aunt Pat, Sheila looks just like Tisha when she was a little girl.” “She sure does.” my aunt responded. My aunt went to something that would change my life forever. “You know, Rico, Sheila looks just like her mother the same way you looked like your father, Carl.” I paused for a moment. I suddenly felt this overwhelming sense of fear take control of my body. I cautiously asked, “Aunt Pat, don’t you mean Terry?” “Aunt, Pat, My father’s name is Terry.” At that very moment, I heard a jerk in her voice that I will never forget. It sounded as if she had been surprised by something or she had let something slip out of her mouth that had been a deep secret up until then. She did not even bother with trying to correct herself. She just came out with it. “Boy, your mother hasn’t told you yet?” She asked. I said, “No.” “Told me what?” Your mother hasn’t told that Carl Jackson is really your father and not Terry Richard?” I told her that this was the very first time I had heard this news. Needless to say our pleasant conversation had turned sour.
We attempted to carry on the conversation, but I just couldn’t. I believed at that time, she thought she had to continue to talk so I would not feel bad about her blurting out such a revelation the way she did, therefore attempting to explain the situation as much as she could. In my mind, she had said enough for one night. I let her off the hook by telling her that I was about to get off from work and I had to go. Before I hung up the phone, I had to ask her how this Carl Jackson person looked. She responded very quickly, but sensitively, Rico, go and take a look in the mirror. With that being said, we hung up. I immediately called my mother to get some answers because I was both hurt and curious the same time.
I immediately called my mother and told her what my aunt Pat had told me. Her response to what I told her pissed me off at the time because it seemed that all she was concerned about was her and her precious secret that got out. I told her that my aunt Pat had let it slip out that Terry wasn’t my biological father and instead a Carl Jackson gets the cigar. She angrily responded, “ Pat talks too damn much!” “She tells every damn thing!” She went on to rant and rave about how little the relationship meant to her when they dated the very short time all those years ago when they were teenagers. “There was nothing between us!” “I didn’t even like him!” “I don’t know what I was thinking!” “It was just something that happened and it was over!” “When I met Terry, Carl was not in the picture!” “I was already pregnant with you when I met Terry and he took care of you!” I interrupted her ranting and raving about herself to tell her that I was coming home the next day because I was not up to going to class the rest of the week.
We said our good-byes and hung up. I packed my books and left work early that night. I walked half way home in a daze. I was in total shock. I could not believe what had just happened to me. Here I am, twenty-two years old, and just now finding out that the man whom I was led to believe by my mother and the rest of my family to be my biological father, really wasn’t my biological father. I felt betrayed. I felt stupid. I felt alone. I felt a sense of not having an identity. I was angry at my mother for keeping this information away from me for what I perceived as selfish reasons. I felt a big gap opening up inside of me. Up until age twenty-two, I thought Terry Richard was my biological father. Trust. He was most certainly never a father to me growing up because I never saw him that often. I never really liked him because I had nothing in common with him. He was just the only connection I had as far as knowing who my father was. I had a sense of identity. I was content with the belief or the story that he was my father and I had even adjusted my life to this thinking. Now, that would all change. I wanted to know more about this Carl Jackson.
I remember walking across the campus on my way to the little trailer home that I rented at the time which was walking distance from campus still in a complete daze. I don’t think I noticed the other students on campus or even cars for that matter as I made my way across the yard. Suddenly, my daze was broken by the horn on a friend’s truck (Patrick Cooper) who offered me a ride home. When I hopped into the truck, I tried to act natural as if nothing was wrong. He asked me, “Wassup, man?” and I responded in what I thought was a calm way, “Nothing much.” He asked me if something was wrong and I just went into this stare, almost into a zone like stare. I began to speak slowly about my very recent experience with finding out about my real father. I guess I wasn’t quite ready to discuss it with anyone because the more I explained the sadder I became. I talked non-stop all the way home. While explaining my story, I felt myself beginning to breakdown in tears. I was able to hold them back until we pulled up into my driveway.
The tears came streaming down my face as I made my way out of the truck. “Take it easy man!” Patrick yelled out as I made my up to the front door of my trailer. I looked back with tears rolling down my face and responded in this hurt and quivering voice, “Okay, man! I will see you later!” I walked into my apartment and went directly to my bedroom and collapsed on the bed. I cried until I had no more crying left in me. I remember yelling, screaming, “How could this happen to me?” “Why me!?” That was one long, painful night of tears.
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Why are so many Religious Blacks so gullible? So what if gays want to get married!?
Ok. The President ‘came out’ last week and publicly supported gays having the right to marry. Who cares? Newsweek Magazine even disrespectfully (in my opinion) plastered a picture of the so-called first Black President wearing a gay (rainbow colored halo) with a caption that reads “The first gay president.” The President giving a politically motivated supportive speech last week did not change any situations in my life. In case you all did not know, Obama is running for re-election in November. The Republican conservatives and any and all anti-Obama individuals and groups are hard at work to make sure that he does not get re-elected. The President ‘coming out’ in support of gay marriages seems to have done exactly what the Obama haters wanted to be done, which was to create an emotional debate in his black voting base. I used the word emotional because the Pew Foundation on Religion reports that Black people are the most religious group in this country, with Hispanics being not too far behind and whites in dead last. This says a lot about our mental health status as a race. The right-winged conservatives assume that Black voting is usually based on emotional moods or emotional status during an election season. Therefore, this style of voting is usually void of any sense of intelligence when dealing with politics and even race.
Religion has almost always been used (ever since the very first Afrikans were kidnapped and brought over here to America for slavery purposes) as one of the main tools of manipulating Black people, therefore, maintaining the ability to control and entire race of people with a damn scripture that supposedly came from some Jesus figure or from some god. Now, you have these Negro preachers all on television challenging and even condemning the President for his supportive statement of gay marriages, citing biblical reasons for their dismay. Negros, please! Get off the gas! Let’s go back into history for a moment. Let’s go back to the slave plantation where the Negro preacher was actually created. Look. The black preacher is more of a danger to the Black community than the KKK, Nazi skin heads, and even a neighborhood gang. He or she is even more of a sell-out than those Blacks who played a part in the murders of Dr. Martin Luther King and Malcolm X.
The Negro preacher is a hired hand for white racism/white supremacy. Meaning, he/she ain’t worth a damn to us. The Black preacher was selected and groomed to be a voice for the slave owner’s plantation agenda. NO BLACK PREACHER HAS EVER BEEN “CALLED” TO PREACH BY GOD! This is a longtime myth that so many black people have been passing down from generation to generation.
On the slave plantation, the Negro preacher was given the slave owner’s version of the Bible on to further the mental initiation of servitude and obedience to the massa. His job was to drive home the point to the slaves who attended church services that ole massa and the conditions on the plantation were not so bad and besides they were all going to get a reward in heaven when they died for all of the physical and mental suffering they were put through while here on earth. Sadly, many too many of us still believe this old hype.
He was a trusted slave that pledged his allegiance to the plantation and its owner. In return for his allegiance, the trusted preacher on the plantation was given the better of the scraps of food from old massa’s table while the other Afrikans had less. He wore somewhat of a better grade of clothes and he was even allowed to wander about the entire plantation and even in the massa house, with little questioning or even being harassed. So, one might ask, “Rico, do you feel this way about all black preachers today?” Well, if he/she is currently teaching out of the very book (Bible, which is missing several books) that has kept us enslaved mentally for over 500 years in this country and afraid to stand up against white supremacy and white racism then yes. I feel this way. I don’t trust any Negro preacher who does not believe nor teach an Afrikan-centered doctrine. Rev. Jeremiah Right teaches and African-centered doctrine. Malcolm X taught an Afrikan-centered doctrine. Noble Drew Ali taught and Afrikan-centered doctrine. I even like the doctrine of the Honorable Minister Farrakhan and Elijah Muhammad. If your Negro preacher isn’t teaching this way, he is teaching you to be a religious, self-hating slave to white supremacy.
So, some of the preachers have a problem with the President’s statement on gay marriage. A lot of us have a problem with the President’s statement on gay marriage based supposedly on what the Bible says about marriage. I will say this. I find it most interesting that some of these jack-legged preachers and silly religious Blacks have such a problem with the ‘gay issue” on a national level, but locally (or within their very own churches) they are silent. These very same objectors of gay marriage on a national level sit up in church every Sunday with a gay choir director, a gay organist, a gay preacher, a gay deacon, and even gay male or female couples. I guess it is ok for them to be gay all up in the church on Sunday morning as long as they pay their weekly lay-away-plan to heaven that most folks refer to as tithing. If you all are so concerned and are supposedly do in-tuned with what the Bible supposedly says about anything, maybe many of you should read in the Bible somewhere where it talks about healthy living and eating a healthy diet and not having all of these damn children out of wedlock! Yes. I said it!
Also, whenever something “jumps off” racially or politically in the Black community, the Negro preacher is always called to either calm the storm of Black anger or fan the flames of confusion. In this situation concerning the President’s supportive statement on gay marriages, these Negro preachers have been “called” to step out front to further fan the flames of confusion. Don’t be misled by these charlatans. They are on the pay roll. Gays wanting to marry should not even be allowed to serve as diversion to what we really need to be concerned about in the Black community. Do I need to go down the list of issues that need to be addressed? Hey, let them get married and let them get divorced like the rest of us. Oh. Yes. Gays get divorced too. Ask Ellen DeGeneres. Ask Rosie O’Donnell. Ask Melissa Etheridge. This list of gays to ask about falling out of love with their partner and getting divorced is long.
Black people, don’t get caught up in the biblical nonsense about a marriage supposedly being only for a man and a woman. Hell, based on statistics, straight men, straight women, and gays don’t really seem to care that much about marriage, especially in the Black community. What Black people should be doing is coming together to build up our communities, supporting each other economically, and raising the children that we decide to give birth to with or without a spouse.
In closing, I did not write this article in support of President Obama or the gay community. I wrote this article with hopes of bringing some semblance of clarity to people who may have gotten off track or who may have been distracted from the real issues. If you are an Obama supporter don’t get sidetracked with silly issues like gay marriage or gay rights. By the way, what exactly in the hell are gay rights? Don’t allow a paid spokes persons for white supremacy such as a damn preacher to speak for you. Do your own reading and research.
Religion has almost always been used (ever since the very first Afrikans were kidnapped and brought over here to America for slavery purposes) as one of the main tools of manipulating Black people, therefore, maintaining the ability to control and entire race of people with a damn scripture that supposedly came from some Jesus figure or from some god. Now, you have these Negro preachers all on television challenging and even condemning the President for his supportive statement of gay marriages, citing biblical reasons for their dismay. Negros, please! Get off the gas! Let’s go back into history for a moment. Let’s go back to the slave plantation where the Negro preacher was actually created. Look. The black preacher is more of a danger to the Black community than the KKK, Nazi skin heads, and even a neighborhood gang. He or she is even more of a sell-out than those Blacks who played a part in the murders of Dr. Martin Luther King and Malcolm X.
The Negro preacher is a hired hand for white racism/white supremacy. Meaning, he/she ain’t worth a damn to us. The Black preacher was selected and groomed to be a voice for the slave owner’s plantation agenda. NO BLACK PREACHER HAS EVER BEEN “CALLED” TO PREACH BY GOD! This is a longtime myth that so many black people have been passing down from generation to generation.
On the slave plantation, the Negro preacher was given the slave owner’s version of the Bible on to further the mental initiation of servitude and obedience to the massa. His job was to drive home the point to the slaves who attended church services that ole massa and the conditions on the plantation were not so bad and besides they were all going to get a reward in heaven when they died for all of the physical and mental suffering they were put through while here on earth. Sadly, many too many of us still believe this old hype.
He was a trusted slave that pledged his allegiance to the plantation and its owner. In return for his allegiance, the trusted preacher on the plantation was given the better of the scraps of food from old massa’s table while the other Afrikans had less. He wore somewhat of a better grade of clothes and he was even allowed to wander about the entire plantation and even in the massa house, with little questioning or even being harassed. So, one might ask, “Rico, do you feel this way about all black preachers today?” Well, if he/she is currently teaching out of the very book (Bible, which is missing several books) that has kept us enslaved mentally for over 500 years in this country and afraid to stand up against white supremacy and white racism then yes. I feel this way. I don’t trust any Negro preacher who does not believe nor teach an Afrikan-centered doctrine. Rev. Jeremiah Right teaches and African-centered doctrine. Malcolm X taught an Afrikan-centered doctrine. Noble Drew Ali taught and Afrikan-centered doctrine. I even like the doctrine of the Honorable Minister Farrakhan and Elijah Muhammad. If your Negro preacher isn’t teaching this way, he is teaching you to be a religious, self-hating slave to white supremacy.
So, some of the preachers have a problem with the President’s statement on gay marriage. A lot of us have a problem with the President’s statement on gay marriage based supposedly on what the Bible says about marriage. I will say this. I find it most interesting that some of these jack-legged preachers and silly religious Blacks have such a problem with the ‘gay issue” on a national level, but locally (or within their very own churches) they are silent. These very same objectors of gay marriage on a national level sit up in church every Sunday with a gay choir director, a gay organist, a gay preacher, a gay deacon, and even gay male or female couples. I guess it is ok for them to be gay all up in the church on Sunday morning as long as they pay their weekly lay-away-plan to heaven that most folks refer to as tithing. If you all are so concerned and are supposedly do in-tuned with what the Bible supposedly says about anything, maybe many of you should read in the Bible somewhere where it talks about healthy living and eating a healthy diet and not having all of these damn children out of wedlock! Yes. I said it!
Also, whenever something “jumps off” racially or politically in the Black community, the Negro preacher is always called to either calm the storm of Black anger or fan the flames of confusion. In this situation concerning the President’s supportive statement on gay marriages, these Negro preachers have been “called” to step out front to further fan the flames of confusion. Don’t be misled by these charlatans. They are on the pay roll. Gays wanting to marry should not even be allowed to serve as diversion to what we really need to be concerned about in the Black community. Do I need to go down the list of issues that need to be addressed? Hey, let them get married and let them get divorced like the rest of us. Oh. Yes. Gays get divorced too. Ask Ellen DeGeneres. Ask Rosie O’Donnell. Ask Melissa Etheridge. This list of gays to ask about falling out of love with their partner and getting divorced is long.
Black people, don’t get caught up in the biblical nonsense about a marriage supposedly being only for a man and a woman. Hell, based on statistics, straight men, straight women, and gays don’t really seem to care that much about marriage, especially in the Black community. What Black people should be doing is coming together to build up our communities, supporting each other economically, and raising the children that we decide to give birth to with or without a spouse.
In closing, I did not write this article in support of President Obama or the gay community. I wrote this article with hopes of bringing some semblance of clarity to people who may have gotten off track or who may have been distracted from the real issues. If you are an Obama supporter don’t get sidetracked with silly issues like gay marriage or gay rights. By the way, what exactly in the hell are gay rights? Don’t allow a paid spokes persons for white supremacy such as a damn preacher to speak for you. Do your own reading and research.
Sunday, May 06, 2012
The Disappearance of Black formatted radio
Earlier this week, we were stunned with the news of Tom Joyner and Michael Baisden being taken off of the radio in New York. These two radio shows reached the largest listening block of African Americans in this country. These two shows educated the masses during a many political elections and sounded the alarm nationally for injustices like the Jena 6 racial incident and the most recent, the Trayvon Martin murder in Florida. Even though these two shows are still operating strong in other markets across the country, New York was really major. A little over a year ago, Michael Baisden was taken off the air here in Dallas when the station he was on changed formats. They went from current RnB and soul to old school RnB classics only.
So, what does this mean? Any thoughts? Well, it all sounds political to me. Whenever national elections, particularly the election of a congress, senate and the president come around, you will notice the right wing conservatives becoming very busy with silencing the voices and rights of minorities in this country. Have any of you been keeping up with the republican push to force everyone to have a state id present with their voter’s registration card on election day? Have you heard where states like Texas are trying to force college students from out of state (which will mainly affect the HBCU attending students in Texas) to go back to their home state to change their voter registration to Texas before they can vote in an election when this has never been the case? When I voted at in elections in the town of Grambling back in the day all I needed was my college id card. Texas republicans are working to change this policy to make it more difficult for Blacks and minorities to vote in state and national elections. It is called the republican voter suppression movement and it is definitely coming to a state near you.
THEY (Conservative Right-wing Republicans) don’t want to see Barack Obama re-elected as president in November. So, they are not playing any games or taking any short cuts. Politics is a dirty game. Next, you have the dumbing down of a people through the use of the media. Black talk radio in the past used to be the voice of the people. Now, it has become the voice of prank calls, a mad minute, coonery, buffoonery, sambo-ism, a man mimicking an old black woman reading church announcements, condescension towards callers, crude jokes, celebrity butt-kissing, along with forced, loud, over the top laugher with a gospel song being played in the midst of porno-graphic rap and RnB music.
Frankly, if “they” were to remove all of the current national black formatted early morning shows or afternoon drive shows, I would not care. Well, I would want to leave Tom Joyner because he does use his foundation and his celebrity status to support Historically Black Colleges and Universities and Black students. Michael Baiseden has become watered down over the past few years, but he does allow you to call in and shout your small business out. So, I would vote to keep him on with a few conditions. The main one I would have is for to stop his constant promotion of interracial dating between blacks and whites. I wish he concentrated more on the rebuilding of the Black family. He has never tried to bring white Jewish women and Palestinian men together on his or Nazi skin head men.
As far as Rickey Smiley and Steve Harvey…I don’t think that they should be removed completely from the airwaves all together. I think that they should just be moved over to satellite radio. So, for those who want to hear their brand of talk, they can pay a monthly subscription. It seems that all of the talk radio shows that we have are hosted by comedians, which is perfect for dumbing down a people. Comedians are non-threatening and people don’t take court jesters, fools, and comedians seriously. Well, what this really means is if Black people really want serious talk and real news from the radio, people like me will have to create our own media source that cannot be dedicated by the powers that want us to remain ignorant and laughing all of the damn time. However, for those in the Black community who want real radio, you must support it with not only your listenership, but with your finances as well. I am just saying.
You see, while we are busy laughing, the racial clock is being turn back. I wonder if the republican forces are going to go after the Yolanda Adams Morning Show or the Donnie McClurkin radio show. I doubt it. These are Christian/religious formatted radio/talk shows. Next to that laughing Black person, the religious Black person is even more non-threatening to the current republican power structure.
So, what does this mean? Any thoughts? Well, it all sounds political to me. Whenever national elections, particularly the election of a congress, senate and the president come around, you will notice the right wing conservatives becoming very busy with silencing the voices and rights of minorities in this country. Have any of you been keeping up with the republican push to force everyone to have a state id present with their voter’s registration card on election day? Have you heard where states like Texas are trying to force college students from out of state (which will mainly affect the HBCU attending students in Texas) to go back to their home state to change their voter registration to Texas before they can vote in an election when this has never been the case? When I voted at in elections in the town of Grambling back in the day all I needed was my college id card. Texas republicans are working to change this policy to make it more difficult for Blacks and minorities to vote in state and national elections. It is called the republican voter suppression movement and it is definitely coming to a state near you.
THEY (Conservative Right-wing Republicans) don’t want to see Barack Obama re-elected as president in November. So, they are not playing any games or taking any short cuts. Politics is a dirty game. Next, you have the dumbing down of a people through the use of the media. Black talk radio in the past used to be the voice of the people. Now, it has become the voice of prank calls, a mad minute, coonery, buffoonery, sambo-ism, a man mimicking an old black woman reading church announcements, condescension towards callers, crude jokes, celebrity butt-kissing, along with forced, loud, over the top laugher with a gospel song being played in the midst of porno-graphic rap and RnB music.
Frankly, if “they” were to remove all of the current national black formatted early morning shows or afternoon drive shows, I would not care. Well, I would want to leave Tom Joyner because he does use his foundation and his celebrity status to support Historically Black Colleges and Universities and Black students. Michael Baiseden has become watered down over the past few years, but he does allow you to call in and shout your small business out. So, I would vote to keep him on with a few conditions. The main one I would have is for to stop his constant promotion of interracial dating between blacks and whites. I wish he concentrated more on the rebuilding of the Black family. He has never tried to bring white Jewish women and Palestinian men together on his or Nazi skin head men.
As far as Rickey Smiley and Steve Harvey…I don’t think that they should be removed completely from the airwaves all together. I think that they should just be moved over to satellite radio. So, for those who want to hear their brand of talk, they can pay a monthly subscription. It seems that all of the talk radio shows that we have are hosted by comedians, which is perfect for dumbing down a people. Comedians are non-threatening and people don’t take court jesters, fools, and comedians seriously. Well, what this really means is if Black people really want serious talk and real news from the radio, people like me will have to create our own media source that cannot be dedicated by the powers that want us to remain ignorant and laughing all of the damn time. However, for those in the Black community who want real radio, you must support it with not only your listenership, but with your finances as well. I am just saying.
You see, while we are busy laughing, the racial clock is being turn back. I wonder if the republican forces are going to go after the Yolanda Adams Morning Show or the Donnie McClurkin radio show. I doubt it. These are Christian/religious formatted radio/talk shows. Next to that laughing Black person, the religious Black person is even more non-threatening to the current republican power structure.
Steve Harvey is at it again. He says “women should not date men who don’t believe in God.” “Those who don’t believe in God are idiots”
Steve Harvey is at it again. He says “women should not date men who don’t believe in God.” “Those who don’t believe in God are idiots”
First of all. Black women rarely ever don't Black men who don't believe in God. One of the first things that they ask a man on the first is “What church do you belong to?” This question has ended a many dates for me personally. It has even gotten to the point where I have serious considered even moving out of the south or checking the internet for dating website that primarily features slender black women, with their own hair (that is not chemically processed) and who are non-religious. Now, these same Black women date men of other races who don't believe in God, don’t have a religion, and who don't go to church. You see. Black men are held to a "PERFECT" and a "NO NONSENSE" standard while other men just have to be white, Asian, Mexican, rich, etc.
Next, Jesus is not God. God is God. ALL INTELLIGENT PEOPLE WITH GOOD COMMON SENSE and a LIBRARY in their neighborhood know that one does not have to be a part of a religion or belong to a damn church to have a belief in a higher power, the Creator, the Most High, and even God. It’s whatever adjective you choose to describe your Higher Power. So, having said this, the men that seem to be giving all these women the blues are the guys who actually go to church and have a religion. Atheists, Agnostics, and people like me, Spiritualists, are not out here pimpin’ women, lying to them, impregnating them and leaving them and the seed he helped to created behind to move on to the next conquest or having sex with other women and men (the down low-brothaz) outside of the relationships.
So, Steve Harvey all those brainless Harvey-ites need to get their minds and their information right. Maybe these sistaz should give the non-church going, so-called non-believing Black men a chance at romance. They just may run across the man of their dreams and stop living in dream-land. Hell, I figured if these same sistaz can date and have children by thugs who don’t pay child support, they should not have a problem with dating an atheist, agnostic, or a non church-attending spiritualist. At least these groups of black men have jobs, education, and no record of criminal activity in their lives. Well, most of us. LOL!!
First of all. Black women rarely ever don't Black men who don't believe in God. One of the first things that they ask a man on the first is “What church do you belong to?” This question has ended a many dates for me personally. It has even gotten to the point where I have serious considered even moving out of the south or checking the internet for dating website that primarily features slender black women, with their own hair (that is not chemically processed) and who are non-religious. Now, these same Black women date men of other races who don't believe in God, don’t have a religion, and who don't go to church. You see. Black men are held to a "PERFECT" and a "NO NONSENSE" standard while other men just have to be white, Asian, Mexican, rich, etc.
Next, Jesus is not God. God is God. ALL INTELLIGENT PEOPLE WITH GOOD COMMON SENSE and a LIBRARY in their neighborhood know that one does not have to be a part of a religion or belong to a damn church to have a belief in a higher power, the Creator, the Most High, and even God. It’s whatever adjective you choose to describe your Higher Power. So, having said this, the men that seem to be giving all these women the blues are the guys who actually go to church and have a religion. Atheists, Agnostics, and people like me, Spiritualists, are not out here pimpin’ women, lying to them, impregnating them and leaving them and the seed he helped to created behind to move on to the next conquest or having sex with other women and men (the down low-brothaz) outside of the relationships.
So, Steve Harvey all those brainless Harvey-ites need to get their minds and their information right. Maybe these sistaz should give the non-church going, so-called non-believing Black men a chance at romance. They just may run across the man of their dreams and stop living in dream-land. Hell, I figured if these same sistaz can date and have children by thugs who don’t pay child support, they should not have a problem with dating an atheist, agnostic, or a non church-attending spiritualist. At least these groups of black men have jobs, education, and no record of criminal activity in their lives. Well, most of us. LOL!!
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