Sunday, May 26, 2013

Is single motherhood a choice?

I have a question.

Does anyone believe that single motherhood is a choice that does not have to be made by so many single women?

Let me go little farther. For years, I have heard a lot of single women with children either complain about being single mothers and scream about how hard it is to juggle work, school, and raise the children all on their own or many of them expect some award or "special blessings" for being a single mother. If I am not mistaken, when a woman gets married first and then has children by her husband, she not a single mother, she is a wife. However, in the case of a divorce, the couple splits, she is still not a single mother (In My Opinion).  If a husband dies during the marriage, this (in my opinion)would make her a legitimate single mother.

I guess what I am saying is if she a single woman and decides to get pregnant by a single man out of wedlock, what is the crying all about? This (to me) sounds like this single woman chose to become a single mother rather than a wife and therefore should not be complaining about the consequences of her choice. Let me be clear. There are plenty of women who make this choice (becoming a single mother out of wedlock) and you don't hear a peep out of them. They "woman up" accept the responsibility of the choice they made in becoming a single mother and they "keep it moving." What is it that these women understand about choices and consequences of choices that so many others who have made the very same choice, but instead of "woman-ning up" they bitch and moan about the consequences of said choice? I am always scratching my head at this one.

Finally, I am not coming down on single mothers. There are plenty of single mothers out here who have done what they were supposed to do as it relates to being parents in the children's lives that they decided to bring here. I am just asking a question and trying to make sense out of why people touch hot stoves when the BIG SIGN stuck on the stove reads, "Please do not touch this stove. It is very hot." but then turn around and cry and moan about the stove being hot. SMDH!!

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